Post # 17
I’m in a unique situation. I started dating SO when we were both 17; on my 18th birthday (we’d been dating for 3 months) he blurted out the big question when he gave me a promise ring, but then we both decided to wait so he could to a proper proposal and everything, so technically I’m a waiting bee at 19. We’ve been together for a year and a half but have known each other since we were 2 years old- my mom knew his family when his dad, uncle, and aunt were teenagers. So it’s kinda a special situation I suppose? And like PP have said- when you know, you know, and I am 100% sure he is the one for me.
Post # 18
Thanks for all the replies! I’m not so much asking for my own behalf, I’d just like to hear people’s thoughts. Someone I work with made a comment today and kind of gave me a look today, ironically he’s a 50 something year old who never married but perhaps that’s beside the point. It just annoyed me.
I do agree with the 50/50 thing, both my fiance and I come from families that’s parents met in their early twenties, married by mid twenties, and have been together 30 and 35 years respectfully. So maybe that’s why it doesn’t phase us. However, I know plenty of people that got married young and for all the wrong reasons…similarily I have two cousins that married around 30 and mid 30’s and did things the typical way according to today’s standards, one’s marriage everyone places bets on when they’re going to get divorced, the other is in the process of one. Both of them have only been married about 6 years. I feel like alot of people near 30 get married just to get married due to their biological clocks ticking, social norms, ect.
My feelings are engagement is just the next step, it’s more solid and it’s a commitment to getting married and not just talking about it. It’s confirmation we can begin actively planning our future and making decisions togethers. I don’t feel like it just means you’re planning a wedding, to be honest I don’t care much about that I’m much more worried about finances and finding a house…the wedding stuff is just a big celebration basically I’m more concerned about making the actual marriage good.
Oh and also with the under 25 thing I’m really not too concerned either by the time we get married he’ll be 26 and or 27 (dependind on when) and I’ll be 25 at that point so we wouoldn’t fall into actually getting married under 25. But I do agree with those who said it can work out, like I said I know people still married who married that young and people that divorced, and vice versa for those over 30.
Post # 19
I agree. I’d probably put it up a couple of years, but the general sentiment…
Post # 20
I was engaged when I was 23. We didn’t get married until I was 29, though.
Post # 21
I just think anyone below 19 hasn’t really begun to understand themselves.
Not that I don’t think people wouldn’t be good together at that age, or would be able to respect the demands of a relationship, I just think they haven’t had enough time on earth of an appropriate age to really understand “what it takes to be me.” If you’re not stable with yourself, and know yourself well, you won’t be able to be a stable part of a relationship.
Post # 22
I agree. And there is nothing wrong with being engaged, but that is different to married.
I also think you change so, so much over the few years after.