Post # 1
I felt the need to pull a little bit of attention away from the wedding (which is an amazing thing, don’t get me wrong. Why else would I be here if I didn’t think so!) and talk about our relationships. I mean, after all, once the bands go on, the white (or colored) dresses come off, the pictures are in and everybody goes home, what else are we left with? Besides, that is what all this craziness is really about anyway. So, I want to know. What are the top 5 favorite things about your relationship? (And gushy stuff is TOTALLY allowed!)
For me it is:
1. Our trust. We trust eachother with everything. Period. And while it does suck at times, in the end we always come out stronger and we can be even more secure in our relationship because we know that, no matter what happens, we can trust eachother.
2. Our friendship. He is my absolute best friend. Nobody has gone through more and puts up with me like he does. We practically have our own language that people are completely confused by but we just… get eachother. (not an actual language but… you get it) But I am sure we can all say that.
3. Our differences. Let’s face it. Me and Mr. Hedgie are pretty darn different. Religions aside, he is as nerdy and uncreative as they come unless it involves “engineering” something. I, on the other hand, am extremely creative and am obsessed with the legal system… (Who gets obsessed with something so “boring”? I do. And love it.) and that is just the tip of the iceburg.
4. Our sense of humor. We both tend to have a pretty dark or dry sense of humor. Then again, he can make me burst in to tears laughing just with one look… seriously… it’s crazy.
5. Our determination and teamwork. We are two very type A, very headstrong individuals who, when put together are one determined, unstoppable force. We have been told “it wont work” or that we would fail many many many times before and by ourselves, I am sure we would have given it a good run and then counted our losses. But together? We have knocked down every door we went after and came out stronger.
Post # 4
1. Our trust. I know beyond any shadow of a doubt that he would never, ever intentionally hurt or betray me, and he knows the same about me. This has allowed us to have difficult conversations in the sure knowledge that we don’t say things out of spite or a desire to hurt. Which leads me to…
2. Our communication. Even when we’re upset about something, we never insult each other, yell, or otherwise lose it. That doesn’t mean these conversations are easy; far from it. But it means that we’re committed to talking out our thoughts and feelings, and we do so pretty effectively .
3. Our mutual support for each others’ goals. We try to be each other’s better angel – to encourage each other do accomplish any difficult goals we set for ourselves, whether it’s losing weight or getting a PhD.
4. Our shared values – We don’t always agree on particulars, but we share a fundamental outlook on the world rooted in valuing compassion, equality, justice, and an understanding that the world is complicated and life is difficult, and that people are generally trying their best. (Now of course we don’t live this out perfectly – we’re not saints! But we try to reinforce those values in each other.)
5. Our conversations. We learn so much from each other.
My favorite things about Darling Husband:
1. His sense of humor.
2. His brilliant intellect – in many ways he’s the smartest person I’ve ever met.
3. His devotion to me.
4. His eyes. 🙂
5. His completely adorable love for our cat.
Post # 5
@Mrs Hedgehog: It took me awhile to write all that out!!
Post # 6
1) SEX. Enough said there.
2) Physical affection hugs, cuddles, kisses, ass grabbing, hand holding
3) Drinking buddy knowing there will always be someone to have a drink with is comforting
4) TV buddy I like having him around to lounge on the couch and do nothing but watch, talk and laugh
Post # 7
I’ll play 🙂
1. The fact that we are always each other’s biggest fans. Darling Husband is always proud of me for little or big things. It could be something like making the rice without any burnt parts or big things (to me) like completing a 12 mile training run. And I’m the same way for him.
2. We truly are best friends. If we see something interesting, if we remember an embarrassing story, when we hear a new joke we always think about telling the other person first. When something goes wrong he’s the first person I want to tell. We have inside jokes and I know that I can count on him for anything.
3. I love our silliness. We can be so ridiculous sometimes that if I saw someone else doing/saying the same things I’d think they were crazy.
4. We balance each other out. Darling Husband is laidback, go with the flow. I’m very type A perfectionist. It helps having me there to give him the little push he needs to finish a project and it helps having him there to remind me to breathe 🙂
5.We respect each other. We both can be pretty headstrong about certain things but we never belittle each other for differing opinions. If we have something that we’re dealing with at work or in another relationship we always go to each other first because we respect the insight that we get.
Post # 8
1) Our sense of humor. I can say the most off the wall, shocking, and weird things, and he will get it. And that goes both ways. I can be a total nerd, and I know he’ll get a kick out of it. He will do the STUPIDEST things to get me to laugh…And if I roll my eyes and “pretend” not to be amused, he just tries harder, which is just hilarious.
2) The way we work together…Granted, we are both VERY stubborn and hard headed, and we clash alot, but in the end, we work through it. I jokingly say we’re like lightening. Our tempers are hot and quick, but gone before you know it. And we very rarely hold a grudge.
3) Our determination…We saw eachother 8 or 10 times in the fisrt 2 1/2 years of our relationship…and made it. That says alot about our commit to eachother, not to mention the amount of trust we have in one another.
4) We share the same core values. I’m not the type of person that has to agree with my spouse on everything, but the fundamental/core values, we share and I like that.
5) Last but not least…Our love. Last night, he woke me up just to tell me how much he loved me. I’m sure I mumbled something back but he said, “No, I really mean it…I’m not just saying it. I really really love you.” That was the most amazing and sweet thing ever!
Post # 9
His Generosity He is the first person to offer help, whether it’s time, effort, an ear to vent to. He always puts others before him and I have never met anyone as selfless. I want so badly to follow his example.
His Respect I think it is incredible the way he respects his family and their values. Even when they don’t see eye to eye, he never loses his temper or gets upset. Just shrugs it off.
Sense of Humor He can always make me laugh. It doesn’t matter if we’re at an amusement park, watching tv, or just waking up. His childlike qualities means he is always looking for the best and brightest in situations
Adventure We love exploring, from finding new restaurants in town to detours and getting lost. We never get stressed by the unfamiliar, we get invigorated and that’s awesome
Balance I can get high strung and easily stressed, and he always knows how to calm me down. One major issue is that I have celiac disease so I can’t eat gluten, which makes dining out quite difficult. Even when I’m having hissy fit, he finds a way to ground me and snap me back to life. And, on the rare occasion he gets upset over something trivial I do the same.
So, this was a lot more about what I love about HIM, not our relationship in general, but I think it works 🙂 Thanks for the thread!
Post # 10
1. Laughter/Joy– i love the abundance of laughter and smiles…Even if I’ve had an awful day, Fiance can make me cackle and just die laughing within minutes. I help him loosen up and feel a lot more lighthearted when he is anxious and tense.
2.Unconditional Emotional Support– We come from overall loving homes, but we’ve both been disappointed and disheartened by certain family situations…Knowing that we are building our own family together with our own priorities and the way we always wanted is simply…a dream come true. It feels very healing for both of us.
3. Shared love of the arts– We love watching movies, listening to music, and discussing books together. I feel like we connect soulfully this way.
4.Passion After many years we still have a lot romance and passion. I love all the dramatic, devoted, intense feelings we have for one another.
5. Dependability We can count on each other without fear or doubt.
Post # 11
1) always being in each other’s corner
2) we are able to have fun together and make each other laugh
3) we are considerate of one another
4) we share responsibilities
5) we want the same things out of life
Post # 12
1. Having a partner in crime. I go on these crazy kicks all the time (“Let’s start running and train for a half marathon! I know we’ve never ran before.” “Let’s be vegetarians! OK, how about at least one day a week?” “Let’s repaint our entire house – tonight!”) and he just goes with it and we have a good time, all the time.
2. He. Cracks. Me. Up. We have all kinds of funny jokes that probably aren’t really even that funny, but just the look on his face or a one-liner will have us giggling like children.
3. We share a lot of goals – we are driven, focused, adventurous people, and I love to share that with him. Between planning the places we may move for graduate school, exploring new places to vacation (we LOVE to travel), and dreaming about our careers and houses and maybe even kids, we truly live our life purposefully and wholly, and I love it.
4. We’re intellectual equals. I’m in academia and he’s in business with a heart for entrepreneurship and we have the best talks. We can talk politics, religion, science, business, technology, foreign country policy, anything. And we almost never fight but we do disagree and debate things, and it is always passionate but respectful of the others’ feelings.
5. All things physical – sex, cuddling, spooning, laying around together, ass slapping, tickling good times 🙂
Post # 13
@Mrs Hedgehog: Love this post!! Thank you…
1) Trust: I am completely insecure coming out of a horrible relationship, although it was years ago, and I definitely have lingering doubts after standing-by as a 12yr old and watching my parents’ marraige end after 29 yrs. Those moments when I realize I have absolutely nothing to worry about… ever… are among the greatest gifts of my life.
2) Mutual appreciation: We talk about this all the time, and it seems so simple, but genuinely valuing having the other person in your life is huge. It’s the big picture that all the details create.
3) He is the smartest person (man or woman) that I have ever met: Yes, he’s a bit on the geeky side… and I love that. He can fix anything, build anything and I never, ever have to worry about something going wrong, cuz he can take care of it. Sigh.
4) Life just gets better and better with him. See #1 (horrible, terrible relationship) and you’ll understand how important this is. How our life together can be both an unpredictable adventure and a reliable routine… I don’t know… but I love him for it.
5) Communication: He listens. Every time. I can bitch~ he listens. I can cry~ he listens. And he hangs on for the whole thing… when we were friends (not that it was ever just friendship, really…) he would give me the gentlest suggestions, point out the positive and the possible that I was completely overlooking. I knew he would be an amazing father (maybe that’s six, but I had to add that).
Post # 14
I love this!
1. He makes me laugh even when I am angry or sad. He knows just what to say or do to get me chuckling and he won’t stop trying until he sees the smile start to crack! We can spend hours talking and giggling, sharing private jokes.
2. He is truly my best friend, he is the first person I want to talk to when good things or bad things happen. I never fear that he will judge me or put me down. He is so encouraging and loving.
3. Being in his arms is my favorite place in the world.
4. We love to compete against each other, we strive to make each other better at all times.
5. Of course we disagree sometimes, but our fights are fair. There is no bringing up the past or putting the other person down. We talk about the issue and we move on.
Post # 15
1. Our Loyalty– I’ve never had a worry in the world about our loyalty to each other. I know that neither of us would ever do anything to purposely hurt our relationship.
2. Our Friendship– I love that we can be like children together…we get pretty ridiculous. We often joke about recording our conversations so we can listen to them 10-20 years from now and just die from embarassment 🙂
3. Our Love & passion– After 3 years we still miss each other sometimes after only a few hours of leaving each other. We share such a strong bond. I still get random texts that says he loves me, or that he thinks I’m amazing. Totally makes my day.
4. Our Values– I’m so lucky to have found someone that shares the same beliefs and core values. We were raised very similar which makes things very easy most of the time. We do argue about things, but I even love the way we argue because we never leave anything unresolved.
5. His dedication to everything he does– This one is just about him because he constantly amazes me with everything he tries to do. He is such a hard worker, and is very smart for his age. I have no doubt he will go far, and I know he will do whatever it takes to take care of me.
Post # 16
ps~ Ms Hedgehog… I had a tough time coming up with different “truths” because your list could’ve mine! 🙂