Post # 1
Who are you having at your top table?
One of my bridesmaids is the girlfriend of the bet man and she has got it in her head that because she is his partner they are sitting next to each other (she has already told the grooms parents and best man that she is going to eat their pork fat!!! weirdo!)
Well she is going to be dissapointed to learn that she is sitting on a different table.
I am having:
My Disabled brother (usher)
I cant get it fully boy girl boy girl but i need my brother on the top table rather than my chief bridesmaid.
Do you think this is ok- i hope she understands why shes on a different table.
Post # 3
Well I fully expected to be sitting at a different table than my guy (who was a groomsmen) at his brothers wedding but they allowed dates to be able to sit with them up there.
At another wedding they just had the bride and groom and everyone else sat at whatever table they wanted. I was annoyed at the thought of having to be apart from him all night and pleasantly surprised when I did get to sit next to him.
It’ll prob just be me and my guy up there because the date and kid situation is complicated. So I think itll just be me and him and a special table for bridesmaids and groomsmen and their dates/families. Also his family is fractured so it would be difficult to make it a family table just me and him saves complication.
Do you have a maid of honor? Why is she not siting up there? I would suggest having a table for groomsmen, bridesmaid, best man etc and keeping the headtable you and family because other than the best man that’s what you have up there.
Post # 4
I would never split anyone from their date. I think it’s very bad manners to split up a couple. Either seat them both at the top table or seat them both at another table, but seat them together.
Post # 5
its more complicated than that- the best man is my fiances brother so he is family. we only have space for 8 at the top table so i dont want to exclude my fiances twin brother to another table when my brother is at the top table. I dont have a maid of honour, just 2 bridesmaids.
They werent together when we started planning the wedding- they are an on/off couple and i dont want to be in the situation where they break up before the wedding and have to sit together.
She is friends with the other ushers so knows them really well, my other bridesmaid doesnt know anyone apart from the 2nd bridesmaid which is why i want them to sit together
Post # 6
Does your brother have to be at the bridal table? I’m not trying to be rude, just trying to understand if you need to work with him being there due to his disability? Can it just be you and your parents, and have the rest of your family and bridal party at another table?
Post # 7
@jothecatlady: yes he needs to be on the top table. My brother has brain damage as well as other mental disabilities and struggles to get along with people he doesnt know, he also has difficulties eating so my mum needs to sit next to him. Not only that but as horrible as it sounds other people feel uncomfortable around him and dont know what to say.
the space at the venue only allows for the tables to be arranged a specific way which is a top table for 8 and 6 small round tables.
i think i will speak to the bridesmaid in question and get her views.
Post # 8
You should do what you want. This is your wedding day and if people dont like what you decide then what kind of a friend/bridesmaid are they?
We have said NO CHILDREN other than sisters/bothers/nephews/nieces (i know this will not go down well with cousins but its our day) and we have mixed up the tables so the familys can get to know one another.
My partner has his brother as his best man and on our top table will sit…
FATHER OF THE GROOM
MOTHER OF THE GROOM
BRIDESMAID (One of my three sisters).
The best mans girlfriend will sit with family of my husband so she has people she knows around her. SHE HAS NO ISSUES WITH THIS! My oldest sister who is on the top table has a boyfriend and three kids….all of those will sit on a different table to her.
Its for what 2 hours…..iv sat couples together other than the top table where they will have to sit with other people for a short period of time.
Its so easy to worry about who you will offend etc etc but at the end of the day these people should appreciate your choices. Its about you and your husband to be not about pleasing other people. Call me harsh but its extra stress to worry about others.