(Closed) Torn about gratuity for caterer.

posted 4 years ago in Food
Post # 2
1112 posts
Bumble bee

seeker:  I’m a fan of giving gratuities based on the work done. I would tell the best man that you would like to give a tip to the wait staff based on their professionalism, speed of service, etc. I would give him guidelines and ask him to use his best judgement. If you have $200 set aside for 5 star service, and they give 4 star service, then they get $150… or whatever makes sense to you.

I wouldn’t be worried about this on your wedding day. Part of the Best Man’s role is to hand out tips (or Father of the Bride if they are paying for the wedding… but it sounds like you are so that’s why I suggested Best Man). 

Guarenteed if you leave it in the cater’s office, the wait staff won’t see a dime. 

Post # 4
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Can’t you just tip the waitstaff individually?  I wouldn’t give the coordinator a chunk of cash and expect her to distribute it fairly.

Post # 5
2181 posts
Buzzing bee

Unless it says in the contract you can’t tip the servers individually, that is what I would do. Separate it out, leaving the coordinators tip and letter to the end. This way the servers get their cash that evening and there is no chance they won’t get it. This way you can also address any issues that might happen with the coordinator and company. 

Post # 6
9588 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

seeker:  I’m with you, I wouldn’t be so keen on tipping her.  But do keep in mind it’s not her fault the company changed coordinators 3 times!  Even if it doesn’t go off without a hitch, consider her position:

She’s got information that’s been passed down 3 times, so who knows how much broken telephone has happened.  You’re too tired to update her information, so she’s left trying to pick up the pieces and make them work together.  

Even if she does her very very best, something might happen that she just couldn’t foresee because of this. 

All I’m saying is I wouldn’t NOT tip her, so long as she does her best.  I wouldn’t give the full $200 unless she can pull it off without a hitch, but I wouldn’t give her $0, either.

I think your plan to wait is just fine.

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