Torn between two places and don't want to disappoint my fiancee?

posted 3 weeks ago in Venue
Post # 2
1210 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

lindz456 :  I don’t get his concern these aren’t children we are talking about here these are adults. Why is he so concerned about the hotel being in the middle of nowhere? Unless you are talking like a bad area.

Post # 4
4521 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If his family is going to come down for more than one night, they would probably appreciate the hotel in the city, even if it’s 40 mins from the venue. Can you offer transportation from that hotel to the wedding? That makes the distance easier for people and means they don’t necessarily need to have car. Or can you provide transportation to the dinner the night before to at least save them parking costs? I’ve been to weddings where this is transportation for a dinner the day before, and they always have good attendance.

Your guests don’t all have to stay in the same hotel. Provide the options on your website or with your invitation and let guests choose if they’d rather stay in the city or close to the venue.

Post # 5
3473 posts
Sugar bee

Have you all looked into the cost of the shuttles from the city hotel? It can erode that 25% savings very quickly.

Post # 6
5057 posts
Bee Keeper

40 minutes away is so close. But I’m from California with a 1+hour commute to work each day. I’ve gone to weddings more than 40 mins away and taken a Lyft home the same night. 

Post # 7
690 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

I agree with PP, get a hotel in the city and get a shuttle or bus to take everyone to the venue, maybe stay at the venue for the night and then back to the city?

Post # 8
9805 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

A hotel being 40 minutes away doesn’t mean they can’t spend a day in the city. It’s 40 minutes, not 5 hours. I think your fiancé’s concern is unfounded and he’ll still be able to show family your city. 

Post # 9
1122 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 1995

Will he even have time right before the wedding to show his family around?  We were so busy the day before the wedding that there wasn’t time to do any of that.  

I think your fiance needs to be realistic about what will happen the day before the wedding.  He won’t have time to play tour guide.  

I think the welcome dinner or rehearsal dinner is a great idea, but the rest of what he might be envisioning, I don’t really think is feasible.  

Post # 10
9223 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

have you looked into an airbnb for his family.  we travel a lot, with my family.  we find that for 6+ people, it is cheaper to rent an entire house. and often find great places in major cities.

Post # 11
623 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018

If I was going to a wedding and didn’t fancy the offered hotel for whatever reason, I’d just make my own arrangements. I wouldn’t personally like to have my departure time dictated by a shuttle time. If I was interested to see the city I’d make it happen by extending my stay, and no big deal to change hotel or drive into the city the next day. It’s a nice extra, but the wedding is of course the main attraction. 

Post # 12
249 posts
Helper bee

i think the welcome dinner in the city the night before is a nice compromise, especially if his family is wililng to pay. 

most weddings i have attended (including my own) have offered more than one hotel option.  sounds like you should book a block of rooms in the city for out of towners who may be interesting in exploring (with a shuttle back), and a hotel close the venue for those strictly in town for the wedding. 

Post # 15
464 posts
Helper bee

Can you organize a shuttle bus from a city hotel to the venue? That way his family can stay in the city and enjoy the city, but you can benefit from the cost of the cheaper venue.

One of my friends rented school buses to pick up at a downtown and a south location for the city and drive us 45 minutes to her venue outside of the city. Worked well for everyone. She had the bus leave the venue at 9pm, 11pm, and 1am. Guests had options for timing of leaving. If they wanted to leave before 9pm they needed to arrange their own transportation.

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