(Closed) Touchy Alterations

posted 8 years ago in Dress
Post # 3
443 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

oooh that is a delicate situation! perhaps you could tell a little white lie and say that your dress shop threw in the alterations at no extra cost? you could say you took them up on their offer so that she would have less to worry about with all of the wedding planning going on or something like that. maybe you could make it sound like you did it for her.


best of luck to you! keep us posted!

Post # 4
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Argh, this is tough. I’ve just gone through a similar situation with our wedding invites. Sadly there was no way to not hurt feelings in my situation but what would do is sit with your Future Mother-In-Law and explain to her that you loved her offer but as she now has FSIL’s wedding to do is she still ok to do your dress? It sounds like you have a good relationship with Future Mother-In-Law and that gives her the chance to go “oh, I might get really busy so maybe you should go to so-and-so instead” or “no, I’d still love to do it”. 

Post # 5
412 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Littlemissmoo is right.  Just ask your Future Mother-In-Law outright if she has the time.  I’m sure she will admit if she doesn’t because she wants you to be happy as well.  You don’t need to indicate that she may not because of the sister.  Just say, remember when you offered to do this?  Well the dress is coming in on ___ date.  Are you still in?

Post # 6
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

While I think your Fiance is right in that any attention your Future Sister-In-Law is getting is appropriate, I still think you have a legitimate concern. If I were you, I would definitely get another seamstress to do my dress. It’s all in the phrasing. I would just let Future Mother-In-Law know that I was doing her a favor by releasing her from the obligation so that she could focus soley on her daughter’s upcoming wedding.

On a side note…I may be alone in this, but I find it odd that your Future Sister-In-Law set her date 4 weeks before you guys knowing that your date was already set. It wouldn’t seem odd if this was a family friend, or a friend of either of you guys, but it seems weird that a sibling would schedule the wedding so close to yours.

Post # 7
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree with JamaicaBride.  I think you should just go to another seamstress because your Mother-In-Law might not admit that handling two dresses would be too much.  And I also agree that it is sort of strange that she just happened to choose a month before yours and a shorter engagement.

Post # 9
4567 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

… I’ve always wanted a winter wedding. They’re absolutely beautiful and cozy and just… gorgeous. I’m having an August wedding. Dead summer, dead heat. It’s going to awesome because its mine, but it seems a little selfish of his sister.

I’d go to another person for alterations without bothering to ask. If she asks, just tell her you didn’t want to burden her with them after finding out she was going to be MOB!

Post # 10
3252 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Awww hun…Im sorry…I would go with another seamtress tho.

Post # 11
1011 posts
Bumble bee

To show your support of your Future Sister-In-Law, you should approach your Future Mother-In-Law and tell her that you were flattered that she had offered to alter your dress, but given that she now has added MOB duties, that you will understand if she does not have time to alter our dress.

Oops.  I just saw KMSull’s response.  I think hers is better.  If Future Mother-In-Law in law asks, just tell her you didn’t want to increase her pressure.  Plus, you admit that she’s kind of far away.  MOB duties are always more stressful than MOG duties!

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