Post # 1
I am in need of some guidance! My mother and I differ on our opinions on to our expectations of my wedding. I like vintage/rustic non traditional decor. My fiance and I don’t want to be in debt over this wedding so I have done DIY centerpieces and odds and ends. She is traditional and doesn’t agree with my decision making.
There are expenses that she doesn’t see as a problem but since im paying, I do. She also feels left out in the planning process and I dont know how to include her because she is so opinionated and we never agree. How do I cope with this, and include her in my wedding planning?! If anyone has had a similar situation please leave me some feedback!!!!
Post # 3
I think the most important thing about this is this is YOUR wedding. If you try to please everyone around you, you will lose the individuality of your day. I think it is important to be open with your mother in law and tell her that choices you are making are representative of you and what you want not of what everyone else wants. Sometimes parents mean well but get overbearing because they feel protective and feel that they “know” best. Its a hard situation to deal with for sure. You can involve her in many things! The trick is to involve her in things you’ve already planned out. For example, get the supplies for your DIY projects, make one yourself and take a picture. Then, have her comeover (and others if you wish) and explain the process so they are helping but with something you’ve already chose. You’ve got to stay true to yourself. Make sure your FH helps you in standing your ground too! 🙂 Hope this helps!
Post # 4
It is your wedding! I have had to have this discussion with my mom too! She wanted something way way way over budget AND totally not our taste.
If you are paying, it is completely up to you! My moms helping out big time so I have to comprimise on a lot with her.
Maybe let her set up a wedding webite? That really doesnt matter that much and she will get to be in charge of something. Or include her in the mundane things- like RSVP’s guest lists stuff… stationary…
Post # 5
It’s your wedding. You need to have a talk and tell her how she making you feel. I think it’s important to emphasis that it’s your wedding and your choices that make sense for you and your Fi. Invite to the third and second appointments with vendors when things have already be chosen. So she doesn’t feel completely left out I don’t think it would hurt to give her one or two things to do with some direction of course.
Post # 6
Thank you for your help! I will try to speak with het soon