(Closed) Traditions and Cultures – I'm curious!

posted 6 years ago in Traditions
Post # 3
Hostess
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I’m from Ohio, so I hear you on the Thanksgiving foods thing. πŸ™‚ Green bean casserole is my husband’s favorite!

Post # 4
Hostess
7561 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

More Thanksgiving stuff.

I’m American but live abroad. I had to explain to my English friends that sweet potato casserole with mashmallows was a side dish, but a pumpkin (aka squash) pie was dessert.

Post # 5
Member
2450 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i went back and forth between minnesota and wisconsin growing up, but my fiance is from texas so he gets the culture shock around here.

i remember trying to explain hot dish to him…

he also says the pace is different here. everybody moves fast… they hurry and worry, he says.

 

 

Post # 7
Member
790 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Im with you ragdoll.

Specially the centerpiece deal, I actually have a cute fall one from a wedding on my dining room table right now! lol

Ive never lived anywhere else but from other posts.. Cash bar is normal where I am (mainly after cocktail hour) I guess its unheard of in other areas. lol

Green bean in my neck of the woods too!

Post # 9
Member
790 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

I cant believe how testy they get about the cash bar when its so normal for some areas! Usually cocktail hour is provided and after dinner is cash. People have to do what they can afford.. sheesh let alone a wedding is NOT about free booze for 6 hours!! You’re not horrible for providing it for 2 hours instead of 6! lol

 

They are cranky on the Knot though. lol Who are any of them to judge!!

Post # 10
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I’ve lived in the same place for my entire life, but I am shocked at how so many “commonplace” things around here are looked on as tacky or inappropriate or just plain weird.

I have definitley heard of green bean casserole, but honestly have never had it at any holiday meals. lol

I have also heard of the whole centerpiece raffle sort of thing, especially at bridal and baby showers. Usually they are given away as a prize at the showers, and at weddings the close family members take them home.

I also ALWAYS bring a gift to a birthday party, shower, or wedding, even if it’s just a card with a gift card or money inside. At each of these events, there’s always a card box or gift table. Nobody acts like it’s inappropriate to “assume” that the guest(s) of honor are going to receive gifts. I really don’t understand the whole “yes, we’re getting married/having a birthday party and we know people are going to bring us gifts but we’re going to pretend we don’t expect it because that would be tacky.”

The other thing regarding wedding/shower gifts I find shocking is that including the registry in an invite is apparently horribly tacky. Never, ever in my life have I ever received a shower or wedding invitation where the registry info. WASN’T included. No one in my circle of family or friends would ever blink an eye at that! Yet some people act like a registry list in an invite is equivalant to nude photos or something. 

Post # 11
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I am from Indiana but there are PLENTY of differences I’ve noticed while living in Utah.

First the wedding stuff.  Mormon weddings are very different and have their own culture all together that doesn’t always follow mainstream US etiquette.

I am not trying to offend but these are huge differences that I see and would like to share.

***Weddings performed in temples are always tiered by definition.  Our local temple only holds 50 people and no children are allowed, but the reception can be like 500 people.  You have to be a temple recommend card carrying Mormon (aka worthy) in order to enter the temple to witness the marriage sealing.  They do not have BMs stand up with them for the ceremony, yet they do have BMs.  So if a parent has an LDS child who is getting married, they cannot see their own kid get married if they are not worthy.

***Receptions are more like an open house.  A couple might send out 500 wedding announcements (usually a full color photo spread), but this is really an invitation to their two-hour long reception.  You don’t RSVP to these events.  Rarely is it a full meal, often it’s cake and punch or finger foods and a big long receiving line.  No dancing.  Wedding gift norms are like $20 gifts (so I was told).  Coincidentally, every LDS reception I’ve been to has been during prime dinner time, like 5-7pm, or 6-8pm but no dinner is served.  I usually stay about 45 minutes as it takes that long to get through the receiving line.  To put on an event like this is about $50-100 so I was told!

***They don’t do rehearsal dinners, instead the family brunch or luncheon is a huge part of the wedding experience.  Closest family and friends come to a brunch or lunch prior to the wedding.  I was invited once, and it was a very big honor I was told.

***They get married young here!  20 is the average age for a woman, 22 for a man.

***Engagement periods are on average 2-3 months long in my area.  No premarital sex, so they actually date for not very long by my standards.  I knew of a young man in my class who met a woman at the start of the semester and already planning a wedding for Christmas break!  Yes, that’s engaged/married in 4 months of dating!  I think the average dating before marriage is about 9-12 months though.  Not being able to have sex is probably why the dating seems so short to me. 

 

***Instead of going on a family vacation or honeymoon, I have heard it is encouraged to put your extra funds towards your year’s supply of food stash.  All LDS are taught to stock up on food just in case.  They make 72 hour kits as church activities.  This is kind of good advice really!

Post # 12
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I grew up in the Appalachian mountains of Virginia.  Weddings there are open (no invites) and the reception is typically cake, butter mints (which are hugely popular) and punch in the church basement.  Since there are no invitations sent out there is normally an announcment in the local paper.   

Post # 14
Member
4676 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

In the area I grew up weddings…

  • It is actually very common to put gift registry information on your wedding invites (not on, but to put the information on a card or add it to the reception card or something) 

 

  • A gap is very common.  Most of the weddings in my area are church weddings, so a gap just comes  with that. 

 

  • What is an open bar?   I never knew before I came here actually.  It’s common to offer free beer and soda throughout the night though.  

 

  • I never heard of a ‘first look’ before here.  
  • also a setting chart is unheard of! 

I like these boards.  So often in this global culture I feel as if there is a ‘set’ way to have a wedding, go out on the street, ect.  There are so many boards ‘bashing’ things that in my area are just common place.   Sometimes it is nice to acknowledge that we all come from different places and different cultures, and do things a little differently!  And that’s okay! 

Post # 15
Member
1832 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

@auggiefrog:  Well said! Ever area of this earth has different acceptable ways of celebrating a wedding ceremony and reception. It would be nice for people to not bash a bee’s wedding day because they think its not appropriate, because god forbid there isn’t a open bar, or the bridal registry card was sent with the invitation, or her wedding band is silver! The horror of it all! LOL

 

Post # 16
Member
778 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I had never heard of a jack and jill party until I dated my Fiance.  Apparently in Upstate, NY (Utica, NY area), it’s a party where the bride and groom invited friends and family to purchase a ticket to a party, and included are free food and liquor.  There are also baskets to raffle off.  All of the money goes towards the party, and the leftover money goes to the bride and groom.  

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