(Closed) traditions that you think are bulls***

posted 8 years ago in Traditions
Post # 62
Member
431 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I cannot stand choreographed first dances UNLESS that’s something the couple is already known for that (they are professional dancers or something to that effect). My FH and I were actually performance partners on a salsa team a while back and I wouldn’t be surprised if people think we’re automatically going to do a choreographed first dance. To be honest, we have this ongoing joke that our “first dance” is going to be really ugly lol

I also can’t stand the whole “being given away” thing. You are not property.  

Post # 63
Member
2521 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Many florists make you a separate “throw away” bouquet that isn’t quite so expensive.  That being said I hate both the bouquet toss and garter toss.  To me, tossing my bouquet, I’m assuming my guests are a bunch of desperate girls… so not the case.  And the thought of having my husband go up my shirt to remove something with his teeth in front of everyone I know is a little too kinky for me (and I’m not super conservative). 

Post # 64
Member
899 posts
Busy bee

Head tables, being given away, not seeing each other the night before/day of the wedding.

The hardest one for me has been the head table, everyone has fought me on it. I always ask them to give me one good reason to have a head table that doesn’t include “for looks” or “just cause.”

Another thing… colored vests! Maybe not so much of a tradition but no one seems to want to go against the grain because that’s what everyone does for weddings. They look so goofy, no one owns colored vests so the only time people wear them are for weddings or prom. It looks so unnatural.

Post # 65
Member
1152 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

We will not be doing the following:

-veil

-garter anything

-tossing the bouquet

-matching bridal party outfits/us choosing their outfits

-father giving me away (he will still walk me down the aisle, he’s officiating anyway)

-special bride/groom and bridal party entrance

-cake (we’re doing cupcakes and there will not be “cupcake cutting”)

-unity candles/the sand unity ceremony thing

-any kind of choreographed dances

Post # 66
Member
32 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2014

View original reply
@canarydiamond: I do NOT recommend throwing a 300$ bouquet, be it real or silk flowers! Im having a brooch bouquet that will cost approx 300$… theres NO WAY im throwing that! i will however have a home-made floral bouquet made of fake flowers. wont cost more than 20$! … just my suggestion. 

Post # 67
Member
294 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

Your parents paying for your wedding. 

Why should they have to?

Youre old enough to get married, youre old enough to pay for it yourself

Post # 68
Member
8031 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

View original reply
@Lala1234:  Oh yes, I would never throw my $300 bouquet, that’s why I question the tradition. I guess as PP have said, they have cheaper ones made for throwing purposes – I did not realize people did that.

I’m having a 4-guest fairly informal wedding followed by a restaurant dinner, so there won’t be any bouquet throwing – period 🙂

Post # 69
Member
214 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
@BlondeMissMolly:  THIS!!!! i cannot STAND the idea that bachelor/bachelorette parties are FREE FOR ALLS to go and basically CHEAT on your partner!? how does that make sense? “oh let me go be unfaithful real quick before i marry this person”!!

my future sister in law gave me a sneak peek as to what is PROBABLY in store at her fiance’s bachelor party (my fiance’s brother) and i almost threw up. she says they’ll probably rent a cabin in the woods and get strippers to come to the house that do all these INSANELY vulgar acts. i told my fiance that if he thinks i’m okay with that, he’s wrong. i told him to blame it on me and not go. i will not stand for that bullsh**.

Post # 70
Member
7 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2014

We’re not doing the “drink dance”. First off, we’re not having any alchol at our wedding, and I think its tacky for your guests to pay to dance with you. Its also so boring for everyone else to sit and wait.

We are doing the garter and bouquet toss, but probably not the “guy who catches the garter puts it on the girl…”

Post # 71
Member
6253 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2014

Unity candles: Only famous because of a soap opera.

Sand ceremony: Just do not get. I went to the state fair and made a sand art sculpture. It had plastic pink sunglasses hot glued to the front of the jar, and a troll doll hair wig stuffed in the opening. One thing I learnd by watching the guy seal these is that you have to be SUPER diligent about making sure the sand settles, and then it has to be sealed. I wonder how many people don’t even bother ith this, and then get home with one ugly, multicolored layer of sand where it’s all combined with itself?

Of course, I guess it’s not any worse a souvenir than a half-burned candle.

We are doing the wine box thing. Also totally made up, but it’ll serve a purpose and look neat in the house. Also, it gives us an excuse to use power tools in our ceremony! Totally planning on having the ring bearer carry a drill up on his little pillow. 😀

Post # 72
Member
509 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

most of them, etiquette? what etiquette, do whatever you feel is right.

Post # 73
Member
601 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

Everything. We aren’t doing: bouquet/garter toss, first dance, any specific dances we are just dancing all night no money no anniversary stuff, glass clinking for kissing, slide shows, asking permission for me being given away, matching bridal party

Post # 74
Member
1081 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

View original reply
@canarydiamond:  I agree with the garter – we didn’t do that, it’s kind of creepy.  And I don’t think the whole “bride’s family pays for the wedding” thing should apply anymore at all. Very silly!

Bouquet toss though… our florist made a smaller version of mine as a “throw bouquet” for free. Most florists do that, or charge minimally. It was cute, and all the female guests loved it. 🙂

 

 

Another one I don’t like… the “etiquette” that says registry information is bad to put on an invitation.  Like hell.  A friend of mine ended up with more towels, Tupperware, and photo frames than she’ll need in a lifetime, and nothing else actually useful because she didn’t put any registry information (people advised her that if she wants cash, don’t make a registry because people will “get it” and asking for cash is even more horrible than putting registry info).  We made a small registry (10-15 items), and made an insert explaining that since we’ve been living together for 7+ years and have all the necessary items needed to start a home, and we’d like to move toward buying a home in the near future.  We also included information on an FHA bridal registry (basically an account to deposit cash gifts into that goes toward a down deposit on a home, because all money put toward a down deposit needs a paper trail.  So the account covers the paper trail part).  We got two registry items, everyone else gave cash, and we got TONS of compliments and interested people asking about the FHA account, everyone thought it was a great idea and loved it.  If you have guests who aren’t snooty and uppity, and who KNOW you as a couple, they WON’T be offended by asking for cash.  Our guests thought it was intelligent and highly practical, and not a single person was even close to offended.

Post # 75
Member
3022 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Prague

I decided long ago that bridal parties are more trouble than they’re worth. I’m so glad they’re not usual in Czech weddings. I would never ask other people to pay for dresses I choose, and weddings are expensive enough without having to buy outfits for 8 other people.

Actually, I am pretty disgusted in general by the amount of money people pay for weddings. But I don’t know if that’s a “tradition,” so much as mass hysteria, lol.

Post # 76
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Ohh where to begin!!

*Getting married in a church even when you’re not very religious. Neither of us are but he feels pressured to get married in a church. 

*Father giving you away/father-daughter dance. My father has never been in my life, so why start now?

*Cake cutting ceremony. 

*Throwing the garter/bouquet. Every wedding I’ve been to, it’s gotten too serious lol. 

*Saying “to love and obey” in the vows. 

 

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