Trigger warning – Missed miscarriage – D&C or waiting?

posted 4 months ago in TTC
Post # 16
Member
823 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

annili :  I just wanted to say I am so sorry for your loss! I had a missed miscarrage to after my 1st round of icsi as well a few years ago. Doctors caught it when I was about 8 weeks and they had me take misopostal. Honestly if I had to do it over again I would probably go for the D&C. Miscarrying was painful and traumatic for me and in all honestly worst of all…..it took 3 months for my hcg levels to return to 0 and I had to keep getting my blood drawn every few weeks until they would go to 0. It was like a constant reminder of what happened..plus I spotted off and on, another reminder..they also would not let me do another transfer until my levels were 0 and after months of waiting I was just ready to try again. Eveyrone feels differently about that but after a month I felt very ready. Anyways whatever you chose I just wanted to say be gentle with yourself and I hope you are successful in your ttc journey! 

Post # 17
Member
785 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I had an mmc diagnosed at 10 weeks. Like you we had seen the heartbeat at the 7/8 week scan and baby stopped developing shortly after that. I’m so incredibly sorry you are experiencing this. I Spiked a pretty high fever so I didn’t get a choice and they insisted on the d&c (worries about sepsis or infection). That said I’d have chosen the d&c anyway because I would have felt terrible waiting for the miscarriage to happen spontaneously. With the d&c my cycle re-regulated quickly as well. I know someone else who had an mmc and opted to wait for a spontaneous miscarriage and it took weeks! 

Post # 20
Member
618 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - California

I am so sorry for your loss. I wish you a speedy recovery and am sending positive vibes your way. This is a really hard time and I hope you have a lot of support and love coming your way. You certainly have that here! I found it helpful to talk to my friends and family (and I discovered that several of them had had MCs before going on to have one or more children not long after). I also found it helpful to watch movies and do other things to distract myself for hours at a time so that I could have a mental break from thinking about my MC. When you are TTC, especially recovering from an MC, it can take over everything else in your life and dominate your thoughts, but you need to be able to move forward while grieving and processing. 

I had an MMC at 8 weeks (though I discovered that my pregnancy was most likely no longer viable at my 7 week ultrasound when we saw a slow heartbeat – somewhere between Week 6 when I had a normal dating ultrasound with normal growth and heartbeat, and Week 7 when my baby had a slow heart rate, something went wrong). I chose to go the D&C route because I had heard too many horror stories of what it was like to miscarry naturally and I just was not willing to put myself through that. D&C carries some risk, certainly, but so does natural MC. It’s an awful choice to have to make. 

The week between seeing the slow heartbeat and seeing no heartbeat on the ultrasound was the worst experience for me. As for the procedure itself, it was physically straightforward. I was put under general anaesthesia (sp?) so I don’t remember anything other than lying down on the operating table and waking up and getting up from the operating table (but I was so groggy I don’t really remember going from the OR into the recovery room). Physically, I was able to function and move around normally later that same day. I had mild cramping and bleeding which actually intensified toward the end of the first week after surgery to the point where I was very uncomfortable walking, and then suddenly that all stopped and there was no more bleeding or cramping. The entire recovery process from surgery to feeling back to “normal” was about a week long, and then I had my follow-up appointment a week after that, which I think is pretty standard. My doctor told me that my recovery experience (bleeding actually getting heavier with cramping) was within the range of what is considered normal for recovery from a D&C.

One thing I will say now is that since I had my D&C I have had three periods and each of them has followed a similar pattern. They have each lasted 4-5 days with two to three days of light bleeding and 1-2 days of moderate to heavy bleeding. I mention this because before my D&C my periods tended to be longer and heavier. I hope this is not cause for concern, but I am going to follow my doctor’s recommendation of TTC for six months and if I do not get pregnant, going back in to see her. This is going to be my third month TTC. I think the second hardest part of the whole experience is that I did not get pregnant right away and I know several women who have and it’s very frustrating. 

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