(Closed) Trouble Sleeping with DH

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
232 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012 - The Chapel of the Sir Christopher Wren Building, 2007 Legacy Hall

I don’t really have much advice about the waking up with his movement thing because I think it’s just something you have to accustom yourself to over time. Not much help I know. But on the heat issue – The only way I can keep cool is having a standing fan aimed at me in the bedroom. I also find the sound soothing, so maybe that would help? It’s insane how much heat he gives off!

Post # 4
Member
1458 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

We both tend to steal the sheets, so what I did was put two twin sized sheets next to each other under a king sized comforter. Yeah our bed looks weird but at least we all have covers at night! As for the tossing, I’m not sure what to tell you. I have a knockoff tempurpedic bed, and my parents have a real one. That demonstration with the girl jumping on the bed and the glass of wine not moving is SO ACCURATE. On my cheaper bed it shakes a little bit, but that could be because I have a cheap bedframe. My parents bed does not move at all when anyone touches it.

Is it too late to look into one of those mattresses?

Post # 5
Member
802 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

And the heat!  I could go on and on about how much heat he produces at 2:00 in the morning!

I feel like my Fiance wrote that haha! He says I go into hibernation mode and instantly get sweaty hot as soon as I fall asleep. I’m like you in the sense that I wake up clutching the covers, he’s like a crocadile.

Heres my solutions:

1. Get a little fan- I have it on my nighstand blowing on me on the lowest setting. It cools me down, which in turn doesn’t make him so hot.

2. Save your pennies and get a KING sized bed. Seriously, it will change your whole life. We went from a full, to a king. We snuggle, but when it’s time for bed, we seperate.  It’s literally big enough for me to have my side, him to have his and our full grown husky to sleep in between us. You won’t notice him moving anymore. You’ll have your own covers.

Before my bridal shower, we didn’t even have a blanket that fit our bed, so he slept with his own twin sized blanket, as did I…and we didn’t have to fight over it!

 

Good luck girl!

Post # 6
Member
1629 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I don’t want to scare you, but I still wake up all the time from his activities. Maybe you got the wrong kind of mattress for the two of you to share. Our futon mattress is nice because it minimizes that. Like hawk said, we have a bedroom fan. He says the AC it too loud for him to sleep at night when it is on. The heat murders me. As for the blankets, lucky for me Darling Husband hates them! He starts out with them on and always kicks them off by morning. More for me!

I definitely do feel used to it now though, and I can’t remember how long it has been since I first felt that way. Maybe 4 years?

Post # 7
Member
5475 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Ugh.  I know how you feel.  He is like a heater, so I turn on the ceiling fan & stick a leg out from under the blankets to keep cool.  Oh, let me tell you about my favorite thing that happens like 3 times a night:  he has broken his nose a few times, so he tends to breathe through his mouth.  Ok, fine, whatever.  BUT- he rolls over in the middle of the night and like, HUFFS his hot dragon breath across my face!  ICK!  He tries to snuggle me and I’m sweating & trying to keep my face out of his breath, and it’s just crazy.  I have learned to sleep on my left side instead of flat on my back, but it does interrupt my sleep pattern something awful. 

Post # 8
Hostess
16213 posts
Honey Beekeeper

We didn’t live together before marriage either, so I wasn’t used to sharing a bed with him. We’ve been married for about eight months now, and I’m honestly still getting used to it like you are.

In terms of the heat, our celing fan works wonders!

Post # 9
Member
1761 posts
Buzzing bee

Fiance and I have completely separate blankets. We spread one over the whole bed when company comes. Anyway, this means we never steal from each other, and we can have different amounts of blankets. I find that it also provides more of a sense of separation, and it might help with the heat issue. The movement is something you need to get accustomed to, or as PPs said, get a larger bed or the tempurpedic.

Post # 10
Member
5670 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

What size is your bed? We have a king, and it’s a harder mattress so the size allows up to spread out and the mattress minimizes the feeling of the movement.

Post # 11
Member
2863 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I have no advice as I am currently plotting FI’s death after he kept me up all night long. I just got a raise at work and I would be lying if I told you I wasn’t seriously considering using that as a tool to convince Fiance we NEED to buy a 3 bedroom house so he can have his own room to sleep in. I feel ya, let’s hope it gets better for the both of us. 

Post # 12
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I totally agree with separate blankets!  It makes a world of difference since my bf also radiates heat.  He also really loves fleece blankets with makes me cringe.  I get to sleep with my beloved sweatshirt blankets and he can have his fleece blanket without worrying about sharing 🙂

My bf has really bad sleep apnea and so will wake me up with his snoring.   Most of the time I can roll over, but sometimes I can’t.   When i can’t, I go sleep on the couch.  Honestly, I voluntarily do it about one night a week.   Its amazing what one good nights sleep will do for the rest of your week!   I tend to sleep “deeper” and therefore am not woken up by his snoring.   I feel bad about doing it, but I need my sleep!

And the bf does it from time to time too so that I can get a good nights sleep in my bed!

Post # 13
Member
891 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I totally agree with getting a king size bed. That’s what we have and we sleep much better because of it. We both have our own space. We don’t fight over blankets, but getting separate ones will probably help the cover hogging.

Post # 14
Member
1498 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

CallmeC:  I have no advice as I am currently plotting FI’s death after he kept me up all night long.

This totally sounds like me!! Fiance and I have two separate blankets. His gets doubled over and laid on his side of the bed and mine gets spread across the entire bed. Mine is a fluffy enough comforter and his is a thin enough blanket that you can’t tell there is another blanket underneath only on one side when the bed is made. At night, I just fold mine over so it’s only on my side. This makes life much, much easier!

However, Fiance tends to do what he calls “snuggling.” Don’t let him fool you though as  “snuggling” is actually a code word for “let me suddenly and randomly fling myself over to your side of the bed and drape my arm and leg over you.” It startles me every.single.time. Usually it puts him close enough that he’s breathing on the back of my neck with his hot breath.  

Post # 15
Member
327 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@Dandelion D:  HAHA!  My bf calls its snuggling tooo!!  Its definitely not

Post # 16
Member
2756 posts
Sugar bee

For the heat – Fiance is a furnace, too. We ended up getting one of these from Brookstone:

Bed fan

It’s a fan you place at the end of the bed on one side and it blows air up to them to keep them cool. We tend to wrap around each other, so I do feel the fan’s breeze in the night, but if I really mind it then I just let him use the sheet and stick to the comforter. But it has helped SO much to keep him cooler at night!

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