Post # 1
Okay so I have a bit of a problem.
I used to be very very good friends w/ two girls. I sent them both save the dates when things were good. One of these girls I work with and see on a daily basis. Problem is, there has been a huge falling out with them vs. myself and my best friend. Things are really messy now. Ultimately I don’t think the friendship will ever be “good” again, or ever be the same. I don’t for see things getting better unfortunately. The girl that I don’t work w/ says she wants to stay friends, but then she goes and acts really bazaar when it comes to my best friend and I (this girl has definite paranoid attachment issues)
My dilemma is, do I invite them to the bridal shower AND the wedding? Or do I not invite them to either.
Its a very small wedding and they will find out about all activities. And keep in mind I work with the one girl, everyday!
I know this is very vague, but its a year or so worth of drama that boiled into one huge falling out. And now I am stressed out beyond belief cause either way I think I am going to be stressed out (if they are there, or if they are not invited)
Post # 3
Well, the general rule is that anyone who gets a STD, gets a invitation. I’ve seen threads like the before and I think the general consensus is that you should still invite them to the wedding, but if things are as bad as you think they are, they probably won’t come anyway.
Post # 4
I’d invite them to the wedding for the reasons stated by PP. Not the shower.
Post # 5
I would invite them to the wedding not the shower. I don’t think you will have any problems or need to worry about it being awkward if they do come because most of the time people don’t act up when with a group. You will be surrounded by your nearest and dearest and that should keep things civil. Just relax and enjoy your big day.
Post # 6
I second (fifth?) all the PPs.
Post # 7
Agreed. You may find it works itself out – if they catch wind of the other coming they may just both decide to skip it.
Post # 8
I voted invite them, though I disagree with it being due to being a bigger person.
You are fufilling the obligation that you set forth with the STD. I agree with the rest that she probably won’t come anyway.
Post # 9
Just invite them.. If they come cool, if they dont oh well. Dont get to stressed.
Post # 10
If you aren’t friends with them anymore, I don’t see a reason to invite them to the wedding. Even if you have already given them a STD. However, you are working with one girl… so to keep things professional, I would invite her if it were me. Who knows, you could become friends again in the future. Basically, do what you want to do. But I wouldn’t invite them to an intimate bridal shower if they were being mean to me.
Post # 11
I don’t think it’s very nice to take back an invitation that you’ve already extended. But they probably won’t come if the friendship is that bad. And if they do come, maybe they would like to work on making the friendships better.
Post # 12
I wouldn’t invite them, save the date or not, maybe with the exception of your coworker. If you aren’t speaking or very friendly, I would think they would expect to not be invited, and I would only invite the co-worker to keep the peace at work.