Post # 1
So fiance and I are planning a wedding in Coronado, CA and have booked a two bedroom apartment style bedroom to get ready in and sharing the space with my parents. We are from Northern California and his side of the family lives 15 mins away from our ceremony and reception venue.
The rest of my family live 1.5 hours away from our reception and wedding venue. Since we are providing cocktails/appetizers and open bar and dinner for the entire evening I am wondering if my guests who live 1.5 hours away would rent a room for the night or perhaps leave early (sad). Has anyone been in this situation before?
We are having about 50-60 people total, got a DJ, florist, double photographers for a small wedding at a great venue. It would be so disappointing if people left early with all the festivities and since we are paying per head/per hour for the open bar guests wouldn’t be utilizing these options to the max.
We are planning to cook an informal brunch in our hotel apartment for the next morning if there are guests that stayed overnight can just walkover to our apartment. The apartment is fully furnished with full kitchen, oven, fridge, utensils.
My mother suggested that after the reception we could invite immediate family to sober up in our apartment and call for rollaway beds etc. The hotel rooms in the area for those nights are 170 a night (very pricey…) and you have to drive across a bridge to get to the other side to find a cheaper hotel room….
Im wondering what options I can provide for my guests to spend the night or be comfortable that night. I spoke to a few people about this throwing ideas around and they have said they might feel uncomfortable “shacking up with bride and groom and family” in the apartment for the first wedding night. Fiance and I recently graduated college where people spending the night on the floor with a sleeping bag and crashing with us is still a common occurence even though we’re living in our own place and we don’t mind.
Post # 3
Is June 5th the correct date? If it’s a thursday night I bet the majority of people will head home early and go to work on Friday. If that’s the wrong date and it’s a Friday/Saturday it’s likely some will stay and some will go home. How long are you paying for the open bar?
Post # 4
I would provide the names and rates of hotels in the neighborhood. If you hold a block of rooms at a neighboring hotel (say 10 rooms at each hotel) they might give you a lower, negotiated rate. This will provide your guests with the option to book rooms if they want to but not feel awkward or obligated to crash on your couch/floor/bathtub.
Post # 5
I would rather have my guests leave early than spend my wedding night with a bunch of people crashed on the floor, in cots, etc.
I would suggest that your guests could rent rooms in the less expensive hotels, and take taxis. Alternatively, they could spend the $170 for a closer room (that’s really not expensive for a hotel room).
But hell would freeze over before my wedding night suite would look like a fraternity house with sleeping people everywhere.
Post # 6
Hi @elliptical2013: first and foremost, I see this is your DEBUT post on WBee… so a BIG Welcome to “the Hive”
1.5 Hours would be too long a drive for me after a Wedding / Party… as I like to kick back and enjoy myself. So I for one would be taking a Hotel Room in the area
(And ya, I’d be waaay to uncomfortable to shack up with your guys on your Wedding Night… truly not how things are meant to be. A Wedding Night is a truly “sacred” time between a Man & Wife, even if they’ve been living together. Married & Single are very much too different things in life… which is WHY we make a big deal out of the event of getting married to begin with)
Otherwise, as you’ve noted, people are probably gonna stop partying earlier, and just leave so they can make the long drive home (When Mr TTR & I go to a Wedding, we’ve done both… stay over, or change our plans, and leave early / drive home… but usually if home is more than 1 Hour away we make plans to stay over).
You mention the price of Hotel Rooms… $ 170 is pretty high end for many people… then you mention “cheaper across the bridge”… is there anyway you could find a decent hotel across the Bridge that would give your Guests a good “Group Rate”… and run a shuttle so your Guests wouldn’t have to drive there from the Reception Site.
Otherwise, honestly it is up to your Guests on what they choose to do… (the downfall of having a Wedding where not the majority of Guests live). If you didn’t run a shuttle, and I was coming, we’d probably take a cab to and from our Hotel if that was at all practical… otherwise, again we’d have to alter our behaviour so as to not drink & drive (one of us not drink… or leave early, etc)
Hope this helps (somewhat),
Post # 8
Should I assume that majority of guests are from 1.5 hours away basically out of town, would it be reasonable to not have the open bar go on all the way till the venue and our event closes say 3.5 hours instead?
I get so depressed thinking of an empty dance floor where all the guests have left and we are stuck with a larger bill because we paid per person.
The event is from 5pm (ceremony) 20 mins
530-630 appetizers/cocktails open bar starts till 11:30pm
I also bought sparklers for sparkler send off pictures but with only 50-60 people it might not look very well if half were gone or (gasp!) all of them… 🙁
Post # 9
I would imagine most guests will go home, since the next day is a weekday.
Post # 10
5 Hours of open bar, yes its a Thursday night its our 5 year anniversary date!
On our wedding website we gave information about some nearby hotels but they are not any where cheaper. Also! There is another wedding going on that very weekend in Coronado and the suite I booked was a year in advance and was the last one available!
Post # 11
Another question also is knowing that bride and groom plan to host a brunch
we have 2 options
1. utilizing the apartment we rented
2. a very pretty clubhouse that my friend volunteered since she lives in the community for free
would guests feel more inclined to spend the night knowing we had a post wedding brunch for all invited?
Sadly, yes, it is a thursday/friday and not a weekend. Sentimentality for trading an anniversary date for a wedding date won over convenience.
Post # 12
@elliptical2013: I think the reason people might leave early is that you’re wedding is on a Thursday. I knwo you wanted to have it on your anniversary, but this isn’t very practical for your guests.
BUT, what’s done is done – so let’s move forward. If you want people to stay over you need to make it convenient for them. Set up a room block and a shuttle service to take people from the hotel to the reception and back. I know Coronado (so beautiful) so if you can’t find a hotel on the island, call hotels near the bridge and see if they offer this. Then, spread the word that you have set up a room block, shuttle, and will be hosting a morning after breakfast. This all says to your guests “we want you to stay! we’re willing to accomodate you!”. If guests still don’t stay, well it is what it is.
Post # 13
The clubhouse sounds nice for a brunch. However, a brunch wouldn’t be worth me taking off a day of work personally unless it were my sister or daughters wedding. Maybe try to get a feel for if people are planning on staying. Since it’s such an intimate wedding these people are likely very close to you and may be willing to stay the extra day. Just depends on your guests. Either way I’m sure it will be lovely.
Maybe you could do the open bar until 10 in case people do leave early.
Post # 14
@This Time Round:
since the availability of rooms is limited due to another wedding happening that same weekend the host of the hotel told me these people rented rooms for the whole week and weekend cause its truly a destination wedding for all involved,
its 9 months out from the date, how soon should I let family members know to make travel accomodations?
It seems so early to send out save the dates. I can call everyone individually and let them know the circumstances and by word of mouth since family talks to each other.
I’ve been kind of hesitant with talking and planning with family for the wedding cause my cousin is planning to have a destination wedding in las vegas 2 months before mine in April and are currently talking with everyone to arrange it I don’t want them to stress out over spending money for our wedding as well.
Las Vegas for her wedding is 4-5 hours away for most people they will have to get a hotel room for sure vs. mine is kind of ambiguous.
Post # 15
This sounds like the best idea!
I will end the bar an hour early, that way it will save on cost and look into downtown san diego hotels for guests to stay and put the information on my wedding website.
The clubhouse is located very close to the freeway that everyone would take on the drive home so if people were to stay the night it would be convenient for them.
Post # 16
Ok, with the confirmation your wedding is indeed on a Thursday night, I would in all likelihood leave early unless I was in the Bridal Party or your were a close family member. 3 hours of driving, $100-$200 on a hotel, and 1.5-2 days of vacation time would be more than I would be willing to sacrifice to attend a wedding.