(Closed) trust issue??

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1909 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@ohboyohboy: First off, welcome to the hive 🙂 I read through your post and so sorry to hear you are having these feelings. You are not crazy, you can’t change the way you feel. I’m wondering one of two things…1) have you been cheated on in past relationships? If so, it may be that you are transferring those feelings of insecurity to your Fiance. 2) In your heart of hearts, do you disapprove of FI’s partying, etc. and suspect it could lead to a path of no good? If so, those feelings could be contributing to the mistrust and resentment between you and Fiance.

Post # 5
Member
1909 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@ohboyohboy: I see…it might be helpful to seek counseling, either individual or couples, to work through some of the communication and trust barriers. Fiance and I found this really helpful when we started our relationship and allowed us to find a way to share uncomfortable or negative feelings without starting a fight. When you hold these feelings in, resentment builds up and when it eventually comes out it’s way worse than if you were able to express the feelings as they happen.

It’s okay to admit that it bothers you when he goes out with certain people. If you trust him like you say you do, then you can appreciate that he is an adult and will know when a situation is not good for him or for your relationship. It’s not healthly for you to worry or get panicked about a situation that you have no control over. That’s where you have to rely on the trust and respect you have for your Fiance.

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