- 9 years ago
- Wedding: June 2011
My best friend gets married next month. She and her Fiance have been engaged for 3 years. They are both still at universtity doing post grad qualifications. They are getting married now so the law is on their side should something happen to the other….
Anyway, she’s having a very small wedding, I’m invited to the reception and I’m really looking forward to it. I sent her a text message today asking her if it was ok if I came to the registry office to see her and her Fiance get married. She politely thanked me for asking to check but she is having immediate family only at the ceremony.
I won’t lie, I’m really sad about it! I totally appreciate her decision and why she wants to keep things small, but I always imagined we’d be there for each other when it came to our weddings.
About 4 years ago we had a BIG falling out. My then bf had broke up with me (he just didn’t love me like that anymore) and I just wanted some consoling, or even distracting. She basically said to me that he was a loser anyway and made her sister uncomfortable. This did not help, I never asked for her opinion on him and we didn’t speak for 6 months (this all happened around my 21st birthday. urgh).
I realised later on that our friendship was better than this, that we were both right and both wrong at the same time, I shouldn’t have over reacted, and she should have adopted ‘if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all’. I have REALLY made an effort since then to keep in touch and meet up and such (I went away to University, she stayed local). For the large part we’re as good friends as we ever were. But since I’ve been away at uni I find it hard to spend time with her, as she’s always busy. I now work full time and she’s in the middle of a PhD. I don’t have many friends since moving home (another frustrating story) as they all have moved away.
I really miss our girly nights in, chatting away for hours on the phone. I secretly wonder if she’s still not happy with how things were before (we’ve agreed to disagree and as far as I can tell there are no problems). I’m worried it’s just me. I know we’ve grown up and moved on.
I hope this is making some sort of sense. I think I’m worrying about a problem that isn’t really there and that what our friendship is now is what it will be now we have future husbands and careers :S
P.s. We meet up at the moment about once every 3 months, and normally as a foursome