TTC, and friends that are nowhere near TTC

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 2
Member
7097 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

hopfenn :  Join some TTC groups on facebook!

Post # 3
Member
4090 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m not trying to be mean, but I’m kinda wondering what you expect? If someone told me they’re going to try for a baby in a few months I’m not really sure what else I’d say other than “that’s exciting!”, because…..nothing has happened yet?

And I have a kid and another on the way, so I don;t think it’s necessarily a lifestage thing.

TTC boards are probably a good idea.

Post # 5
Member
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

hopfenn :  I have a similar problem. It’s not that I expect my friends to ask a ton of questions even though some have but I have no one to go crazy down the TTC spiral with. 

Feel free to PM me! I just got off BC and we’re sort of TTC/ NTNP. The bee helps me a lot because I know the people who will answer are those in the same boat. 

Post # 6
Member
14979 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

saratiara2 :  +1. 

Even while starting TTC, I really had no urge to talk about anything to anyone cause, what is there to talk about?  Hey, we’re TTC!!  Oh, you’re gonna be having lots of lots of sex, especially around ovulation, that’s awesome, let me know how that goes!!? 

Post # 7
Member
2010 posts
Buzzing bee

join the POAS boards. Most people in real life don’t want to talk about cervical mucus and OPK strips as part of normal conversation. Not trying to hurt your feelings, but I think you just have unrealistic expectations. I’ve been TTC over a year and if a friend told me she was going to start ttc soon, I’d be like “oh, super exciting! Anyways, where should we go for dinner next week?”. 

Post # 9
Member
14979 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

hopfenn :  I guess that makes sense if you’re the type of person that likes to talk things out outloud to others.  But I feel like it’s such a personal decision, that most of these talks are usually just between the two people who are going to be doing the TTC… .everyone has their own reasons and choices and ultimately nothign anyone else says really matters?

Post # 10
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

pinkshoes :  +1….exactly, I literally not sure what to say after the initial “awesome, good luck!” because if I ask how it’s going, it’s like… I’m asking details about their sex life. 

I can get onboard with the chatting about the actual pregancy or forthcoming baby, but the whole TTC thing, I’m sort of at loss for words, and I have a bunch of friends trying or have had recent babies. I’ve had to tell my husband NOT to talk to his parents about it much beyond the whole “sure, one day” thing as they are totally the type to check in, and I have ZERO – correct that- NEGATIVE desire to have them asking how our unprotected sex life is going.

Post # 11
Member
2521 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

hopfenn : I mainly just talked to the TTC board here about it ๐Ÿ˜€  Most of my friends either already have kids or aren’t planning to, so I feel you.  Plus I’m kind of private and don’t really love talking with friends about my sex life, my cervical mucus, or my overbearing MIL!  

Post # 12
Member
7717 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Agree with pp – join the TTC boards here and let that be your outlet. I honestly wasn’t too interested in hearing all the details about my friends TTC journeys or their pregnancies before I was in that phase myself, so I try not to talk about it much around friends who don’t have kids yet. Also dh and I were very private about TTC in general so we wouldn’t have felt comfortable sharing that journey with most of our friends (I did confide in my bff though, who has a son). If you’re looking for a community to bounce ideas off of re: things like prenatals, you’ve found it here on weddingbee! Join the monthly POAS threads if you haven’t already – awesome community there.

Post # 13
Member
447 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

hopfenn :  definitely join the POAS threads here on weddingbee. I never spoke to any of my friends about TTC, short of just saying “we’re going to be trying for a baby soon!” And their response was generally “oh how exciting” and that was the end of it. Its way too intimate a thing to go into detail about. However, nothing is off limits on the POAS boards so just join a month one and go for it! Literally whole threads dedicated to cervical mucus if you so desire.

Post # 14
Member
735 posts
Busy bee

Besides online…Are there prenatal classes in your area? They might have some in-person resources for groups where you could have a tea and chat with some ladies. Even maybe try meetup?

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