(Closed) TTC Bees– What do you say?

posted 7 years ago in Babies
Post # 3
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@Fire: I didn’t really tell anyone we were TTC for this reason. I knew that it could take awhile and didn’t want lots of people to ask, because I was afraid it would bother me too much.

I’m sorry this is happening to you. Maybe just a “No” with no explanation would make people back off.

Post # 4
Member
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We’re getting comments now.   Since we were open about the fact that we’re TTC, we just say “We’re working on it!”  

Post # 5
Member
555 posts
Busy bee

It is frustrating since, no matter what, I believe everyone is entitled to their privacy and should announce on their timeline. I just say when we have something to share we will. 

Post # 6
Member
1993 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m with you, Fire!  I really wish I hadn’t blabbed about TTC, but I didn’t know this was not an overnight deal:)  I get the same question, and I hate it, and I haven’t come up with anything clever to say either.  I would love to come up with an answer that says “No, and can you stop asking me that…”  But in a nice way.  I’m also searching for an answer to “Just try to relax and it will happen.”  I have to sit on my hands to keep from strangling people who say that.

Maybe, to the Are You Pregnant Yet question… (smiling and looking a little bewildered at the same time) “Wow, Everyone keeps asking me that, and it’s starting to get a little depressing that I keep having to say no!  It’s kind of making me feel worse about it that EVERYONE asks me all the time….(Looks sad) We’re still not there yet.”

What about that?

Post # 8
Member
1993 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

This is not an answer that will help at all, I just find it hilarious…Miss Sand Dollar posted a reply to me in her thread about stupid things people say and she brought up a very good point:

“For some reason your vagina and sex life just becomes a free-for-all for everybody.”

She cracks me up:)

And you know, even if we hadn’t told people we were TTC, they would still think of dumb things to say like, “When are you going to get pregnant?”  Because Sand Dollar is right.  People think your business is their business once your married and they assume Babyville is imminent.  It’s actually the craziest thing ever, that people think they can ask the things they ask.

Post # 10
Member
1993 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Fire: Not stupid at all!!!! I feel the exact same way!  Plus when it occupies your brain 99.9% of the time, it’s really hard not to mention it.  It actually honestly interferes with a lot of activities in life.  For example, I am so in love with hot yoga, but it’s 90 minutes of hot work-your-butt-off misery (but good misery?), and the RE says no hot yoga after ovulation, because we don’t want to fry the baby if we get pregnant.  The baby has no cooling mechanism, it can’t sweat like we do….So I had to take up pilates for the back half of the month, and I got both studios to “freeze” my packages depending on what half of the cycle I’m in!  So when I O, I have to call Ms. Linda at the Hot Yoga Studio and tell her to freeze me for 2 weeks and I’ll let her know if I’m pg.  Vice versa for the Pilates Studio!

Sometimes people make special arrangements for you too, though, when they know you’re trying for a baby.  Neither places freeze packages on a regular basis, and they made an exception for my situation.

But it totally gets in the way of normal everyday activities sometimes!  And so definitely not stupid!

Post # 12
Member
1993 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@Fire:  Haha!  Me too!  I’ll never be able to keep my mouth shut for 3 months!

Post # 13
Member
2538 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2009

I always say “working on it.”  It kind of ends the conversation, but gives them the picture.  I told most people and I still would do it the same way.  But people stopped asking after about 6 months.  

 

Post # 15
Member
1776 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

@Fire:  This is EXACTLY why my fam doesn’t know we’re TTC yet.  There’s a select few friends that know, but I think they think it’s more of a “when it happens, it happens” thing.  Sooo…it’s easy to deflect the question when I’m asking because usually the people that ask have no idea we are trying.  We just got married in Feb, so I just make a joke of it and say “We haven’t even been married a year yet…no babies just yet!”

 

Laughing and then saying “we’re working on it” sounds like a good response.

 

Post # 16
Member
643 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

We haven’t told people that we are TTC, and we still get this question ALL THE TIME!!! “Are you pregnant yet?” “When are you going to get pregnant?” “When are you having a baby?” 

It is so incredibly frustrating. I just keep telling people “Not yet. Maybe soon.” Or sometimes I answer with a vague answer like “Maybe next year.”  But it’s so frustrating when you are actually TTC and it’s not working!!!!! 

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