(Closed) "TTC" via adoption. Anyone else?

• LuluInLove
• 7 years ago

• Wedding: March 2013

3/18/14: Spent all day nesting and clearing out our spare bedroom. Put up curtains and organized all his little clothes. It was a special time for hubs and I. We unpacked baby’s new mattress since we are doing at home Montessori with him. Had a terrible nightmare tonight relating to the baby. So so scary : (

3/19/14: We met bmom for the second time. It was such a great day and so much more relaxed. We had lunch together. We also worked on beading and did some painting on a canvas for the baby. Even my hubs got involved which was neat, especially because he is not very crafty or artsy fartsy at all. He was putting lots of effort into it which made it super cute. We also met her adorable little daughter who happened to fall in love with my husband. It was the sweetest thing ever. I have never seen a little baby so swooned by him and his curly hair. It was cool meeting her because we got to see a little bit of what our baby boy may look like. Oh and Bmom even suggested we meet again to work on stuff! Great great day. 5 weeks until baby boy is here. I can’t believe it. I’ve said this a million times and I’ll say it again—it’s so surreal!

We also found out from work that baby won’t be able to be on our health insurance until the adoption is legally finalized when he is 6 months old. : ( We are responsible for all of baby’s medical bills after birth so this is kind of stressful to think about. Please pray he is healthy. I heard someone say we could look into medicaid but I’m not sure what to do because I don’t think we’ll be able to get a social security number for the baby until around the 6th month when we finalize. Ugh. Looks like I need to do  more research on the subject, that’s for sure.

Also having issues with a family member understanding it would be best for them not to be there the day of the birth. So many things could happen. She could decide to keep baby for a few days or a week. The birth may not happen according to schedule. It’s just not a good idea for family to fly out of state and take off work with so many factors. PLUS, it has been recommended to us that for attachment purposes the baby is only with us the first few weeks of his life. He will lose all he knows and his bmom. He doesn’t need a ton of “strangers” handling him until he settles in with us. I think we’ve decided we’d like for visits at least a week after baby is born. He’s not ours yet.

• LuluInLove
• 7 years ago

• Wedding: March 2013

I spent all afternoon researching this insurance thing. And guess what? My HR office is completely off their rocker. What they have told me goes against federal law!

 Under OBRA’93 and HIPPA they cannot deny the baby coverage before the adoption is legalized. They can’t make him wait 6 months. He will be covered as soon as he is born! It’s the law.  *insert sigh of relief here* : )

I called my agency and they confirmed. They said if my HR did not change their tune they would write them a letter.

It was kind of awkward to kindly tell HR what they are telling me goes against the federal law. To top it off I also looked up laws in my state that basically reitarate the federal laws.

The head of HR responded to my message today with a one worded email saying  “Interesting”

I’m kind of shocked to be honest. My job’s HR is pretty on top of things. They had insisted the baby could not be covered until finalization and had even told me I needed to look into Medicaid.

Note to future adoptive families: Do NOT let people tell they cannot add a baby to your insurance until the adoption is legalized in court. That’s considered a form of discrimination against adoptees.

• LuluInLove
• 7 years ago

• Wedding: March 2013

3/23/14: We made an announcement. It’s facebook official! Gahh, this makes it so much more real.

Read what I wrote here: http://mayyoualwayswalkinbeauty.com/2014/03/23/timeline-writings-from-early-on-in-our-journey/

In other news… this whole insurance thing seems to be an issue with the carrier (not my job). I’m nervously waiting to hear more. The insurance provider’s policies are clearly outdated or their insurance rep is confused? I don’t know but it’s stressful. UGHH. There is a possibility lawyers might need to get involved. I’m really hoping that’s not the case.

• LuluInLove
• 7 years ago

• Wedding: March 2013

• LuluInLove
• 7 years ago

• Wedding: March 2013