Post # 1
Hey Bees, Darling Husband and I were married in August, and originally talked about waiting one year to TTC. He’s ready to start, like, yesterday and would try for a baby immediately if I told him I was ready. We are 29 and 39, and he can’t wait to be a dad. I’m in an online grad program that is set to finish in the Spring of 2019.
Well…baby fever has hit like a train, and now Im thinking about what it would be like if we pushed up TTC and have a child while still completing the online courses. Now I understand when reading about other bee’s baby fever!
I haven’t made up my mind completely yet, because I want to be sure before making a decision like this. My heart says baby, my head says school and baby would be a ton. I spoke with Darling Husband about it and he is on board with trying sooner, and giving me any help I would need to get schoolwork done while having our baby.
Have any of you been pregnant, delivered and had a newborn while taking classes? Was it doable with the flexibility of online courses? Am I completely insane and should just wait until next August/September to TTC?
Thank you for any insight you may have!
Post # 2
Are you also working full-time?
I finished my master’s degree while taking working full-time, taking 1 class online, taking one in person and writing my thesis this past Spring. I got pregnant in March and graduated in May at 3 months pregnant. It was exhausting, but doable.
I would not recommend doing that though in the final trimester of pregnancy or with a newborn. I am currently 39.5 weeks pregnant and my energy level and comfort has plummeted. While our little girl has not arrived, I can only imagine it will be much more difficult with a fussy newborn that doesn’t sleep more than a few hours at time.
My suggestion, start TTC in late 2018 or early 2019 if you plan to graduate in Spring 2019. That way, if you get pregnant right away, you would still graduate 2-3 months before the baby arrives.
If you decide to start TTC now and are successful, be prepared to potentially take a semester off to care for your child and re-cover from birth. If you are find with delayed graduation, then it may not be a concern.
Best of luck!
Post # 3
- Wedding: March 2014 - Chicago, IL
My best friend is a high school chemistry teacher and was taking online classes for her master’s when her son was little and she was pregnant with #2. She was able to do it with a 2 year old and an infant, so I’d say with the right support system, time management skills and motivation it’s possible.
Post # 4
I’m over 5 months pregnant. I work FT, and I am taking two grad classes online this semester. It has been tough for me to concentrate at the same level as before. You have to be self motivated to do well at online classes. I haven’t been so much, but I’m doing ok. I missed an entire week of assignments due to pregnancy brain. I mixed up my weeks and got Fall break wrong, something I would never do not pregnant. I’m due one March, and plan to take Spring and Summer classes off before starting back in August with a five month old.
Post # 5
annonbee857 : thank you for your reply! I am working full time as a teacher and will be working through my pregnancy. I plan on taking 8 weeks off for maternity leave and then Darling Husband will take 4 off from his teaching position. I am hoping to be able to finish in time because the pay difference between bachelors and masters for that following year would be 10k. We could really use that!!
I could potentially take a semester off online classes and finish one semester into the next school year to receive the pay bump part way through the year, but it would still be missing out on the full year’s increase.
Post # 6
FutureDrAtkins : That’s a positive thing to hear! I’m glad it worked out for her!
MRSsrm85 : I’m pretty good with self motivation, but I can totally see myself getting pregnancy brain and mixing things up similarly. 🤦🏻♀️ Do you think organizers would help? Setting up a white board with due dates written in at the start of each course? Congrats to you with your coming due date!! Have you found professors to be accommodating with course work due dates?
Post # 7
singingbee5 : I think it also depends how much help, free or not free, you will have.
Some people will say it is doable, they did it…. But they don’t mention their retired mom, or some family member lived down the block and could help whenever.
Post # 8
singingbee5 : My professors don’t know that I’m pregnant. I don’t see why they should know. Unless I’ve been hospitalized during my pregnancy, I don’t expect special treatment for being pregnant.
My program is heavy on group projects. It is really not fair to my group members if I stop corresponding to them while taking care of a newborn. Some people feel entitled to special treatment, I do not. I’m due in March. My little sister is practically super mom, but she didn’t sugarcoat the first month for me. She was a zombie the entire time. It’ll be too late to drop my class so I’m taking that semester off.
Post # 9
singingbee5 : I’m a full time PhD student and currently pregnant with my first. A lot of people have told me graduate school can be a great time to have kids becasue of the flexibility of your schedule; however, if you’re also working full time it might be a bit much. I’m due in March, and will be doing only research hours in the winter term so I don’t have to deal with classes and a newborn at the same time. Some things to think about:
1) Can you realistically work ahead in your classes so you can take at least a few weeks off to recover after birth? If you only have short windows where assignments are available to you, that probably won’t work very well since you may have something due while you are in labor or just after delivery.
2) What happens if you have issues during pregnancy, deliver early, or just can’t cope with the classwork after baby is born? You need to know the policy for getting an incomplete grade and finishing later, including if you’ll need to talk to the instructor about the possibility ahead of time. Same with potentially dropping courses, you’ll need to know deadlines and the impact that will have on your transcript/GPA. I’m currently struggling to keep up with my deadlines becasue of a preterm labor scare that had me in the hospital or at my doctor on and off all week. If baby decides to come before the term is over in 3 weeks, I’ll have to take incompletes for all my classes. These are things you can’t plan for, so having a backup plan in place is a must.
3) What does your support system look like besides DH? Who can watch the baby while he’s at work if you have school work that needs done? What about helping with meals, cleaning, etc?
4) Pregnancy, at least for me, has been extremely draining. I’ve had a whole host of health issues come up, and it’s hard for me to keep up with everything because I’m always needing a nap. Plus all the doctors’ appointments have sucked all my time away. You probably want to think about how many hours you currently put into school each day and see how much flexibility you’ll have to increase rest time and time spent at the doctor.
Post # 10
I work full time and go to school online. I will be finishing my degree in Summer 2018 and we are actively TTC. Granted, at this point if we were to conceive I would be finished with my degree by the time the baby arrived. If there was any conflict with finishing my degree first before the baby was to arrive I would hold off on TTC.
Post # 11
I was in an online bachelor’s program while working full-time and graduated May 2016. We started trying in August 2014, but didn’t conceive for a year. I ended up having our daughter about a week before graduation. I worked ahead in a lot of my classes in preparation and professors were very accommodating. After having her, all I had left was to complete one online final exam. In retrospect, I’m happy with the timing. I had a fair amount of nausea in the beginning, but an otherwise uneventful pregnancy, and I found it pretty easy to keep up during pregnancy. I don’t think I would’ve felt the same during the newborn days and I think I would’ve struggled with motivation. That is me personally, and if you are very motivated, I’m sure you could make it work. My advice would be to start trying if you’re ready for baby because you never know how long it will take…as long as you are extremely motivated to make sure you finish school.
Post # 12
I just finished my thesis for my masters, at the time I was about 4-6 weeks pregnant when finishing it off. It was CRAZY. I was super fatigued, all the time, but I got it all done. If you factor in all the possibilities such as nausea, fatigue etc and still think you can do it go ahead. I am really glad I finished before I hit the latter stages of the first trimester as I don’t think I could handle it right now (I also work full time). One of the ladies in my class last semester was probably about 8 months pregnant, wish I’d asked her how she was feeling now! My suggestion would be that if it becomes too tough, just take six months off if you need it and be kind to yourself! There’s no need to feel bad about delaying things slightly.
Post # 13
Thank you so much everyone who offered insight and advice! Darling Husband and I talked about it in depth last night (he read over your replies to this board with me!) and we feel confident with the family support we would have near by, plans we can make to support each other, and calls made to hr to double check requirements for receiving a pay step depending on when I finish the program, that we would like to start trying for a few months now to aim for a possible baby in the Fall, but stop before it would come too close to a due date right before the same semester I would like to attempt my capstone project.
If we get pregnant soon, we’ll be excited and make it work! If we don’t, we’ll wait and try again in the Fall. Like others have said, we don’t know if there may even be challenges conceiving.