TTC with husband with low sex drive?

posted 2 years ago in TTC
Post # 31
704 posts
Busy bee

koiocha :  have you considered using OPKs rather than charting? I temped but really relied more on my OPKs to predict when I would O. My hubs has a lower sex drive too so it was much easier for us both to know when I was going to O and focus on BD’ing then. EOD would’ve been exhausting. The first time I got pregnant we BD twice and the second time we BD three times in my FW. 

Post # 32
1450 posts
Bumble bee

I’m not sure this is the case in your situation but my husband had a lower sex drive and eventhough we were trying in the fertile window we weren’t successful.  Turns out my husband has super low testosterone which was playing into his lower drive and also causing us problems getting pregnant (less than optimal sperm).  We worked with a urologist and he took several different medications (did you know men can take clomid too?) and finally did succeed in getting pregnant.  He now takes testosterone replacement shots to keep his levels in the normal range and his drive is better.  Not saying for sure this is the case here, just speaking from my own experience. 

Post # 34
2659 posts
Sugar bee

FX for some answers watching your cycle closely and maybe this will entice him to be a bit more enthusiastic when he can “see” what’s going on and what’s needed!

Post # 35
5 posts
  • Wedding: October 2013

My hubby is similar. He’s had a low sex drive since we started dating. He – like others have previously said – just isn’t educated. However, when I try to get him involved and educate him on my FW he says it’s a lot of pressure. We’ve only been TTC for about two months so it’s all still new. I’m thinking I may just need to initiate around ovulation so I’m not missing out.

Like PP said, just talk to him and tell him exactly how hard it is for women to get pregnant. With any luck he’ll step it up a bit!

Post # 37
233 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

koiocha :  woooo congrats! Glad you found something that worked for you! 

Post # 38
1 posts

That’s great congrats on the bfp! 

I just wanted to add here that I have been going through the same thing with my husband. Low sex drive especially during my FW (fertility window), even though we are both committed to having a child. Explaining the statistics for odds of conception (to an also very scientific minded man) has improved his willingness. I found showing him the POS Opk was helpful. Also I got him the supplement tribulus which is supposed to help improve sex drive. Of course do you own research on the subject, but I can say from our experience that he was much more horny and interested in sex, I might even say he was raging! 

As a side note here. After ttc for the month I talk with my Darling Husband about the saddness I feel when I do get my period. I feel like this really opened his eyes about the importance of timing each month as well bringing us closer. I hope this helps someone.

Post # 39
1368 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Just realized this is two months old and you got your bfp. Congrats by the way.

  • This reply was modified 1 year, 6 months ago by  Dr_dazzle.
Post # 40
95 posts
Worker bee

I’m the one who has low sex drive. TTC is such hard work. We’re both always too tired. And at the same time I’m stressed about whether or not it’ll even happen because we’re already 37 years old. Sigh. 

Post # 41
1 posts

koiocha :  If your trying to conceive, I’m on that train with u. I guess just more sex

Post # 43
6 posts

koiocha :  has he had his testosterone levels checked? My husband had the same issue and turns out his levels were REALLY though so he got put on testosterone injections and it fixed the problem. 

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