Post # 1
We all know the age-old saying, “blood is thicker than water”, but I am having a really hard time with this.
When I first got engaged, it was agreed that my Future Sister-In-Law would be my maid of honor. My fiancee’s twin brother would be best man, and everything was perfect. We were one, big happy family.
A few weeks ago, my Future Sister-In-Law made a very big mistake…now, we’re not talking a “washed a red sock with a bunch of whites” mistake…we’re talking “denouncing your family because they don’t like the felon of a ‘husband’ as she likes to call him, because we decided to go get married and not tell anyone. But its not a legal marriage, its a pagan/witchcraft thing” kind of mistake. She literally cut herself out from the family. BUT, now that she is out of money (he can’t get a job because there is a warrant out for his arrest and he has 11 felonies, including battery charges), she has come crawling back to mommy and daddy, said she sorry, and they are 1 big happy family again.
And she wants back in the wedding party. UGH! I don’t want her standing by my side at my Christian wedding. I just don’t. My fiance doesn’t know what to think. He keeps saying, “well, she is my sister.”
SO, do I suck it up and let her be in the bridal party? Or do I put my foot down and say no.
Post # 3
I would say stick to your guns and say no. Being in the bridal party is such an honour and special thing and it would be a shame to have her bringing her drama so close to you on your wedding day.
I hope Fiance supports you in this because that will make it all easier.
I’m not sure what kind of relationship you’re looking for with her or if you’re wanting her to play a role in your wedding, but you could consider having her do a reading or being involved in the ceremony in some way, but keep her out of the bridal party.
Post # 4
Thanks…I just needed some encouragement 🙂
Post # 5
I would suck it up for the sake of family harmony and keep your fingers crossed that drama stays at a minimum. Just seems easier, I think, and it sounds like that’s what your Fiance would prefer. She’d be invited regardless, so it’s not like you avoid her SO’s presence either way.
I can understand your objection to the felonious husband or whatever he is – he doesn’t sound like good news – but it doesn’t really matter than her ceremony was pagan, right? Just as with any religious ceremony, the legal bit is separate from the religious part of the wedding. If she didn’t legally marry the guy, that’s one thing – but that doesn’t have much to do with whether the ceremony was pagan or not. I’m assuming you wouldn’t ditch her as Maid/Matron of Honor just because she identifies with a different faith than you.
Anyway, I’m sorry that you are upset and I hope it works out OK!
Post # 6
The part that bothers me the most about what she did is the hateful things she said about the family. I found my Mother-In-Law bawling one nite because her words hurt so much.
I guess it is just hard for me to forgive it all. She blames that she did it on the fact that my Fiance and I were getting so much attention for our wedding….so that hurts too.
I’m aftraid to not let her back into the wedding party because they are my in-laws to be….