(Closed) Two bestmen, one maid of honor, and a bridesmaid

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
Member
6929 posts
Busy Beekeeper

They need to be announced?  When I was a bridesmaid we came in together but no announcement.  If you really  must, there’s no need to state their “duties,” just name them.   I think you’re overthinking this a lot.  She’s probably not worried about it at all!  Don’t dwell on it.

Post # 3
Member
1740 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Is your Maid/Matron of Honor married?  If not, you can have a “Maid of Honor” and a “Matron of Honor.”   Or you can just call both woman “bridesmaids” and both men “groomsmen” without specifying further.  

Honestly, I would elevate your cousin rather than make her seem like odd-woman-out among all the other “bests.”  It’s a nice thing to do, and really, titles are only symbolic – they really don’t matter.

Post # 5
Member
47458 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
ksklemenz96:  just a note- it’s the wedding party, not the bridal party. The bridal party is the Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man. If the DJ announced the bridal party, those are the two people involved. If you want him to include the Best Men, it is the wedding party.

Post # 6
Member
2730 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I also think you’re overthinking it. Just have the DJ announce the “Wedding Party” and their names – no titles. Honestly, they probably won’t even hear the DJ to notice any difference. They’ll be too caught up in the moment of walking out and all eyes on them.

Not to add to your worries but, are you planning on having speeches? Who will be making them? Both best men and your MOH? I think you would either need to have all 4 make a speech or designate one Best Man and the Maid/Matron of Honor to make speeches. But, if you have all 4 make speeches you might as well name your cousin as Maid/Matron of Honor also.

Can you talk to your MOH? Explain to her that you don’t want to make her feel any less special but you also don’t want to cause (another) rift with your cousin? She might be completely okay with it and then problem solved.

Post # 7
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

I second what 

View original reply
MelissainNC said. Is either of the married and one could be matron of honor and one could be maid of honor? Or when it comes down to it, must they really have a title? They are there standing next to you because they are important in your life. I say this because in mine I’m having my sister, and three best friends. The four of us (not counting my sister) ahve been best friends for 20+ years and they are more like sisters to me than anything, and I’m not a “bester” friend with any one over the other, and that’s a dilema I have. My sister isn’t married, so she could be maid of honor, but all my friends are, so they are all just going to be equals and if someone doesn’t like it, phooey on them. Are you having wedding programs? If so, if you have the members if the wedding party listed, you could add a small paragraph by their names of how you know them and what they mean to you, which might lessen the sting if you double up on titles for people. 

I also overthink everything, so I can definitely understand your struggle lol. We don’t even have a date set, right now in the VERY early planning stages, and I’ve already run myself ragged because I’ve planned and re-planned everything. I’m a huge planner and like to have things laid out so I can just follow the list. 

Post # 12
Member
1011 posts
Bumble bee

View original reply
ksklemenz96:  I have one ☺️ I have a binder with every printable and checklist imaginable lol. As well as two different folders 

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