Post # 1
As the title says I’m torn about assigning roles to my bridal party. I’ve always wanted to have my two best friends – one from childhood who lives a few hours away and one from high school who lives close to me – as well as my fiances sister who I am also close with. My friend from childhood is extreemly close to my heart but she lives far away and can have a flaky / disorganized personality at times. My friend who lives close by is super reliable, always there for me, and already helping me get organized / plan – not saying she is any less dear to me but we don’t have the same brain like me and my other friend do. My childhood friend is the one I most imagine making a speech at my wedding but I also don’t want my other friend to do all this work (because she will feel like she needs to and honestly is in a better position to help) and not get any recognition.
I thought the idea of having two maids of honor was great until someone mentioned that the lone bridesmaid will feel left out – which I don’t want to do. At the same time both my best friends are equally important to me in different ways. Is there an option that will work with three? I’ve thought about trying to find an extra bridesmaid to even things out but I’m not sure the person I’m considering would say yes. Please let me know what you think!
Post # 2
It seems obvious your nearby friend should be Maid/Matron of Honor and the other two bridesmaids.
Post # 3
0 maids of honor, 3 bridesmaids, and everyone acts like grown ups. No one needs special recognition. The guests don’t need to know who planned the bachelorette party or helped zip your dress.
Post # 4
If you have two Maid/Matron of Honor you will have two unhappy people. If you have one Maid/Matron of Honor you will have one unhappy person. Seriously. Might as well not have one vs having two. They will both be miffed that you couldn’t decide.
Post # 5
just have bridesmaids. You don’t need a Maid/Matron of Honor. You can thank your friend for her help in another way. I also think it’s a bit odd to ask someone to be Maid/Matron of Honor over someone else based on their organisational skills. Surely it would be whoever is most dear to you?
Post # 6
excellent advice here. I completely agree.
Post # 7
3 bridesmaids, no Maid/Matron of Honor.
Have them line up during the ceremony by height so there’s no “preferential treatment”, it’s solely by height so the photographs look balanced. The programs (if you’re having ceremony programs printed) can be listed in alphabetical order, or if you know already the height order.
Post # 8
Why can’t they all just be bridesmaids? My Fiance has 3 groomsmen and no best man because he didn’t want to choose between them (whilst I have my sister as MOH).
Post # 9
Echoing PPs, I’d just make them all bridesmaids. No need to choose one to be Maid/Matron of Honor.
Post # 10
Yep, all bridesmaids. If my sister hadn’t have been my Matron of Honor, I would have made all my girls bridesmaids and not had a Maid of Honor because I know it would have hurt people’s feelings if I made anyone other than a blood relative my Maid of Honor.
Post # 11
I just had two bridesmaids. No need for a Maid/Matron of Honor
Post # 12
I agree that you do not need Maid of Honor. I decided not to have one because everyone thinks they are the closest to me and I do not want any hurt feelings if I pick one and not the other. I decided to just have 6 bridesmaids. 3 sisters, my elementary bff, my highschool bff, and my college bff.
Post # 13
I personally don’t think these titles matter much. The only reason I have a Maid/Matron of Honor is because my sister wanted to be a Maid/Matron of Honor. Otherwise, I’d just have them all be bridesmaids as I’m super tight with the three other ladies I’ve asked to be in the wedding.
Post # 14
I’d either have them all be bridesmaids or all maids of honor. No need to differentiate (and I sort of don’t get why people do that to begin with).
Post # 15
Three bridesmaids, no ranking in titles. For who signs the license as witness, they draw straws or throw rock paper scissors.