(Closed) Ugghhh Stupid Facebook!! How to handle someone asking me via fb for invite?!?

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: What would you do about the person requesting an invite on facebook?

    Ignore the request

    Respond with a polite private message

    Other- Please explain below

  • Post # 18
    Member
    4334 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    …and delete the post if you haven’t already!

    Post # 19
    Member
    1595 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    never unneccessarily burn your bridges- send the note, it’s perfect!

    Post # 20
    Member
    1736 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    @Dell79:  +1

     

    A kind note will go a long way (even though my first reaction to her FB invite plea was “for realz!?”) ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Post # 21
    Member
    1697 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I voted to give a private message but then i read your story and it would be ok to ignore or private message. She clearly understands how the wedding invite thing goes as she said ” i hope”.

    Post # 22
    Member
    1659 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I think it’s appropriate to write her a little note saying its nice to hear from her, but it’s an intimate wedding and you hope all is well and you’ll see her around. I wouldn’t ignore it just in case she brings it up again and makes it double awkward ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Post # 23
    Member
    914 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I would not ignore her. I would just write her a nice little private message telling her your wedding is going to be small and close family members only.

    Post # 24
    Member
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    View original reply
    @peachacid:  ditto again and loool

    Post # 25
    Member
    2699 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    View original reply
    @WillyNilly:  lol….I posted about the no of days until our wedding on FB a while back and not one person commented…..we must be really popular if noone wants to invite themselves to our wedding ha ha!

    Post # 26
    Member
    804 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    If you are replying to her I would reconsider the “Get our heads on straight” thing. This statement has no purpose and can make it seem like you are really stressed out and undecided about things. You don’t need to go into any details with this girl only that you only invited family and very close friends.

    I would make it very short and I wouldn’t include any hints about any celebrations at a further date until you have the guest list figured out for that as well.

     

    Dear …..

    We are having a small wedding consisting of 60 people, all of whom are just family and close friends. I am sorry that you can’t be with us to celebrate our wedding. Please accept our sincerest apology.

     

    Yours, …….

    Post # 27
    Member
    665 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @OmahaCupcake:  I would defiantely ignore that. Id be really annoyed if anyone even put me in that position. I wouldnt bother sending a note, if anything it makes it into a bigger deal than it is ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 28
    Member
    55 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    View original reply
    @MrsWBS:  love it. I didn’t know even know you COULD make private lists and I’m pretty sure 97% of my status updates for the past 7 months have been purely wedding related. luckily i haven’t had any awkward requests for invitations.

    actually there was one…she didn’t actually request one but i heard she got really ticked about it when her parents got one and she didn’t… next thing I knew she blocked me on FB….to be honest its pretty much a win-win.

    My instinct is to just ignore it but I’m learning people just do not get hints.

    Post # 29
    Member
    2965 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    The only thing I’ve posted on FB about my wedding is I changed my status to engaged and posted 1 ring pic. It was my christmas present. That’s it. Then I got one of those awkward messages. It was my FI’s aunt from Louisiana wanting an invite to the wedding. I only met her once and that was when FI’s other aunt passed from cancer… Awkward but she made her way to the guest list ๐Ÿ™ ONLY because she was family. We are trying to keep our wedding small as well. 75 guests MAX. 

    I would say send her a private message that you apologize but you are trying to keep the wedding small… THEN if I were you I would keep wedding related things off FB. Just think if one your friends or co-workers constantly ranted on about their wedding and you didn’t really want to hear about it because you knew you weren’t going to be invited. If you’re that excited, pick up a phone and call a friend or something.

    Post # 30
    Member
    365 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Hmm, I am of the mindset that while you should have known better about posting on the wall if you didn’t want this to happen, she certainly should have also known better to fish for an invitation in response.  If this were me, I would delete the status (and her comment will be deleted as well), and possibly send her a quick private message that due to space limitations, you are only able to have family and close friends of the family attend, but you hope you both can catch up in the near future.

    I have had so many unsolicited posts from acquaintances and long lost family members pop up on facebook requesting intimate details.  My general course of action is just to delete the post and ignore, as I find it incredibly rude since I have posted nothing about the wedding.

    Post # 31
    Member
    1468 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    if shes not really a friend I would just ignore!!!

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