(Closed) UGH! Fiance is clueless & wants to pick his own suit!!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Who do you agree with?
    Me - Khaki suit with light aqua shirt and nice aqua/turquoise tie : (13 votes)
    50 %
    Him - Black suit, white shirt, and whatever tie the random sales lady throws at him : (13 votes)
    50 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    1982 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I think you need to do some creative photoshopping here. Find a bride in a dress that is the same color but nothing like yours, on a beach getting married. Set up the groom dressed in the black suit. Show them that they most certainly do not match–especially if her look is more “beachy bride” and less “formal bride.”

    If nothing else, buy him his outfit and then tell him he looks damn good… but  then tell him if he wants, he can add a matching jacket, too. That would keep it in line with the wedding, but with the more formal look he wants.

    And if none of those things work, ask him how he would feel if you dressed completely wrong for the wedding–how your first look would go, and how he would have a vision for how he wants to see you in your white dress. tell him your vision for him is much the same. Good luck! I totally get that its his wedding too, but if he just doesn’t look good in the things he picks, well–this is kind of the one time that matters.

    Post # 4
    Member
    768 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2010

    Ok…calm down girlie! I do think the khaki suit would look better, but it’s important to make him feel validated and that he’s NOT an idiot. So, why don’t you give it a week? Just don’t mention it for a while. And then nicely bring it up after you’ve both had some time to cool off. Hope that helps!

    Post # 5
    Member
    6597 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I agree that your choice would suit the wedding better but I also think that he should have some choice in his outfit!

    I would show him pictures of a beach wedding to show him the look you are going for and then hopefully he will be able to pick something that he likes from that style!

    Good Luck!

    Post # 7
    Member
    5263 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Oh, I feel you on this. 

    I had a vision for the Groomsmen – grey tuxes, to go with grey accents on these Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses I loved without being too matchy matchy. 

    But R feels grey tuxes are trendy, and black is classic, so I’m sucking it up. Honestly, I wheedled a bit but I would be upset if he told me what color to make the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses, and I’m excited that he’s voicing an opinion and planning something, so I’m just going with it. It’s the marriage that counts, not the perfectly coordinated wedding, right? 

    Post # 8
    Member
    484 posts
    Helper bee

    Ugh how irritating. My husband hates shopping but when he does it he can come home with some really interesting (read: horrible) stuff. So I know how frusterating it can be. Definately keep going with the “you are going to be so hot (temperature, not looking) in a black suit on the beach”. Maybe if you pretend you are focusing more on his comfort rather than his lack of taste he will start to see your point of view. Or make it really easy for him with your choice – like find the suits, shirts and ties and say “all we have to do is purchase them.” He may cave when that is easier than going out and finding his own suit. Also going into Spring, a khaki suit is more practical than a black suit. He’ll have more opportunity to wear it for other occasions or to work. Hope any of this helps. Good luck.

    Post # 9
    Member
    972 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    LOL sounds like my man! He is the same way, always wants to be right and do opposite of what I want and I find myself later on saying ‘told you so’, and he nods in agreement.  I had to take my Fiance to the suit shop to help him pick it out and we tried on a million different styles, colors and shoes just so he can see all the differences.  If I didnt go with him, he would totally be clueless, and now we are both happy with what we picked.  He will be soooo uncomfortable with a black suit on at the beach, you need to tell him again and again, sometimes men just dont have common sense in some departments, thats why they have us to guide them and care for them

    Post # 10
    Member
    2532 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    I like the idea of your look better BUT at the same time if thats what he wants to wear then so be it. You might just want to say that black is going to be really hot for people to wear and it doesnt really fit the style of a beach wedding. Maybe he just doesnt understand that? If he decides to wear the black suit and white shirt then maybe you could buy a nice tie for him that would go with your other colors. Or maybe he could wear a colored shirt and a nice tie that you buy for him? You want him to feel comfortable and like himself too so dont disregard what he has to say. ANyways, I think an ivory dress and black suits will look fine together! Dont stress too much – for all you know 20 years down the line you could look back at the khaki suit you chose (if he wears it) and say “thats so out of style, what was I thinking!?”

    Post # 11
    Member
    7152 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I totally understand how you are feeling. My guy was set on having black and I don’t want black at all. What I did was not mention it for a while and showed him pics of what I wanted and how m=nice it’ll look. You can do this on David’s Bridal’s website. Now he is doing exactly what I wanted in the beginning and thinks it’s his idea, lol. Perfect!!

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