Post # 1
My mothers has several (meaning 7 brothers and sisters) and I am not close to any of them. In fact I dont even like them. Unfortunately my mother sent several of them STD’s 6 months ago. Now Im in a conundrum because I dont want these people at my wedding. At my moms 25 year anniversary party were sure that some of them stole some of her gifts, her remaining bubbles (there were 50 or so…why you would take them though is beyond me), several arrangements despite me telling her (my aunt) not to, and half of her cake. Im worried that on my wedding day Ill be stressing that some of them will either make a scene (drug/alcohol problems) or steal my gifts. I never see these people and I dont want a relationship with them. My mom sees them maybe once a year but is not on the best terms with them. Is there a way to not extend them an invitation? I was considering having my mom call and say that my Fiance and I eloped so I dont have to see them or have them steal my gifts/centerpieces/ext.
Note: I also have no interest in ever seeing any of these people again for other reasons as well.
What to do bees??
Post # 3
Is your mom funding any of the wedding? Is she adamant about them being there or do you just feel obligated?
Post # 4
- Wedding: March 2012 - Father's Vineyard Church/ A Touch of Class Banquet Center
I would have a frank and honest conversation with your mother. It’s clear that this isn’t just a “having second thoughts” guest list issue. There are some serious risks that come with inviting them, and what it comes down to is making sure that you are happy and unstressed (as can be) on that day.
Post # 5
I say don’t invite them.
Did the STD they got have the location of the ceremony and/or reception? If not, just don’t send them invitations. Send them Announcements after the fact instead maybe.
It doesn’t sound like you have any interest in a relationship with them at all, so not to worry about hurt feelings. Your peace of mind on your big day is way more important IMO.
Post # 6
My wedding is at my parents house so they technically know the date and location already (just dont know the time).
My mom is fine with me not inviting them. My father doesnt really want them there at all since hes been dealing with their BS for the past 35 years. Its ultimately my decision.
Post # 7
@MsNarwhal: I think, in that case, don’t invite them. If they say something about it, cross that bridge when you get there.
Post # 8
Usually I’d say if you send Save-The-Date Cards you need to invite people. But in this case I think you can get away with not inviting them. If anyone asks why you could say “based on things that happened at the anniversary party we’ve decided not to” – if you’re brave 🙂 You can also say your budget/size has changed and you aren’t able to accommodate everyone you originally planned to.