(Closed) ugh..saving money for the wedding help!

posted 5 years ago in Money
Post # 4
Member
846 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

personally, i think that if you are going to get married, you should be able to talk about money openly first. it’s almost impossible to plan a wedding unless you know exactly how much you can spend.

my Fiance and i opened a joint bank account shortly after we got engaged, and we both have been putting portions of our paychecks in our savings account to use for the wedding. i also put all of my savings in from before i even met him, so most of the wedding is technically going to be paid by me.

Post # 5
Member
11 posts
Newbee

You should absolutely sit down and have an up front conversation with your Fiance. It’s definitely a lot harder and a lot more stressful to try and plan your day without a frank conversation about the expectations for budget and wedding planning. A marriage is supposed to be all about communication right? 🙂 If you don’t have a direct discusson about the wedding and the budget, then you may end up with a wedding that is more stressful on both of you (both financially and emotionally) than you anticipated.

Post # 6
Member
960 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@StephanieHerbsty:  +1

@Dolcebabe: You need to talk to him. Its kind of like talking to your Fiance about debt, its never a great conversation but its always best to know going in, what you’re really getting into. 

Maybe start with something along the lines that you want to make sure you keep the budget reasonable and low and you don’t want to wipe out the savings so if you knew, you’d know what to keep it under. eg. even if he has 20,000 saved, you don’t nessesarily want to use all 20k on the wedding.

Post # 8
Member
2831 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Well for starters; money needs to be discussed! Do not shy away from the subject; he is your Fiance, you should know what his finances look like!

Post # 9
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

Money should be the first thing you talk about after you are engaged.  I have access to his accounts and know what he has.  I am paying for most of the wedding though since I have more saved.  We know how much the other owes on CCs, loans, etc.  I just think a couple should be honest in all ways, especially about money.  

Post # 12
Member
3053 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

“Hey babe, I was looking at this venue & I think it might be really nice but it’s a little pricey. I know we talked about our budget and I’m worried that the 20k will empty out your savings. It would make me feel a lot less stressed if I knew how much we would have left after spending the money for the wedding.”

My SO & I are VERY open about money & it makes things so much easier! Definitely just talk to him & ask. I always think this when I’m about to do something that makes me nervous: It’ll be over in 5 mins…5 mins from now & won’t be nervous or worried.

Post # 13
Member
1157 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@Dolcebabe:  We have been trying for 3 years to get married.  Finances, mostly mine (due to job loss) has been the problem.  After 6 months at my current job, we are finally caught up on our bills.  We have still not paid for ANYTHING for our wedding.  But our plan is to open a seperate bank account and each of contribute XXX amount to the account each payday.  This account is SOLEY for wedding expenses.  I know, it is hard to do anything when you have nothing left over.  Just take what ever you can and put it in a seperate account.  It may not feel like much, but as the time passes, the amount you will have saved will increase.  Try not to be discouraged, it will all come together.  Even if you have to scale back on things, your wedding day will still be perfect!

Post # 14
Member
117 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

You definitely need to talk money.

I agree with mrs brownie. We opened a joint wedding account and have been putting aside a set amount each month toward the wedding. It also came in handy when my parents and his parents wanted to contribute. We gave them the bank account number and they have also been putting money in.

Post # 16
Member
9209 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

@Dolcebabe:  Have you thought about just eloping?  If you don’t have any money, you feel weird about only him paying for it, it will wipe out some/all of his savings, and he (seemingly) doesn’t want to spend a lot of his money on a wedding… eloping might be just the thing.  You can go somewhere cool, hire a photographer to document it all, and share the pictures with all your loved ones.

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