(Closed) Un-ask a bridesmaid that nobody likes

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1571 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If you are interested in preserving some sort of friendship with her, you probably shouldn’t be totally honest.

Post # 4
Member
899 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

This is a tough one. You know her and how she would react. How would she react if you said something like, “Mary, I love you and when I got engaged, I was so excited and kind of jumped the gun asking everyone to be my bridesmaid. Fiance really wants the sides to be even and I have more bridesmaids than groomsmen. I know you don’t want to wear a dress and you aren’t into weddings that much, so I thought you would understand.”?

If it were me, I would keep her as a bridesmaid and maybe limit how much she is involved in things. It sounds like you are close enough that even if she wasn’t a bridesmaid, she would still be at the wedding. So being a bridesmaid isn’t that much different.  

Post # 5
Member
627 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

You asked her. I think unless the rumor spreading or the inappropriate comments to your Fiance occured after you did so, then you knew who she was before you asked and it would kind of unfair to tell her that now these things are deal breakers.

Post # 6
Member
1723 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Well, I wouldnt honestly un ask her because she is your friend you know? And who cares if people dont like her- shes your friend for a reason- bcuase YOu like her However- if you feel that you want a more happier bunch wearing dresses and is more keen for this position– then just be very straight forward with her and tell her that you would love for her to be ur bridesmaid but you think that So or so would probably enjoy being a bridesmaid cuz of the dress wearing a part alittle more? you of course dotn wanna hurt her feelings but i do think youd perfer a more enthusiatic group as bridesmaid– but make sure its becuase of this inention and not becuase of the fac that others dont like her..?

 

Post # 7
Member
2496 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 1991

If you asked her and you’re friends with her, then what does it really matter if no one else likes her?  I’ve been in plenty of weddings where I wasn’t totally fond of one of the bridesmaids (especially my sister’s SIL…), but whatever.

Unless she’s causing MAJOR drama or totally blowing off her responsibilities, I wouldn’t un-ask her.  It just seems a little rude after you already asked for her to make a commitment to your wedding.

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