Post # 1
Ok, here’s the deal. I am getting married on June 5, 2010. My fiance has nine groomsmen and I got all excited in the beginning and asked eleven girls. Big mistake. Now the wedding party is just too big. I was fine with it until I went wedding dress shopping the other night. My mom was meeting my roommates and I and my mom was picking up this particular bridesmaid on the way. She was already running a half hour late. Then on top of that, when they were about fifteen minutes away from her house she demanded my mom turn around and go back and get her cell phone because she forgot it and her boyfriend was going to call her. Then she spent another 15 minutes in her house trying to find her phone. All in all she made my mom 45min late for my dress appointment. Then the entire time she sat there on the phone and texted him and paid NO attention whatsoever to me. (I know that sounds bitchy but I didn’t ask her to come to text her boyfriend). With the size of our bridal party I want to unask her. Is there any good way to do this?? Plus her and I have only talked twice since we have been engaged (it’s been a year). What do I do?
Post # 3
- Wedding: June 2008 - Winery in the Gold Country
I don’t think I’d "un ask" her to be my bridesmaid unless she did something to totally jeapordize our friendship, like sleep with my fiance, or tell me to my face that she disapproved with my marriage and would not be friends with me anymore if I married my husband. Being late to a bridal appointment is a very excusable offense. I know it is your big day but there is a distinct possibility that she and her boyfriend were in a serious fight, or something was happening in their lives that may have been very important. Try to give her the benefit of the doubt on this one. Unasking her to be your bridesmaid can essentially jeapordize your friendship, and I assume that because she is your bridesmaid, she is a good friend of yours.
Post # 4
I’m with Penguin on this… you could do some serious damage to your relationship with this girl if you do unask, so ask yourself if it’s worth it to lose this person from your life.
Post # 5
Sorry, but this seems a little silly. There is nearly 18 months between now and your wedding so there is the potential for each of the 10 other girls to do something that will annoy you. Are you going to then “unask” them to be in your wedding? I wouldn’t think so if they seemed important enough to you to ask them in the first place. Why don’t you just let this blow over and see how things go.
Post # 6
I think that maybe you should remeber (as we all should) that while this is YOUR big day and to you the most exciting thing EVER, the people involved are probably NOT as hyper excited about it as we would really love them to be.
Just talk to her – tell her that you will try not to be all about the wedding if she will try to be more supportive and be involved. Maybe you should ask her if she really wants to be in the wedding and let her know that you totally understand if she says no. Maybe she thought she could afford it when you asked and now she can’t but doesn’t want to hurt your feelings.
Talk to her and you will work it out, I’m sure!