(Closed) Uncle tried to ruin wedding! :*( Need some bee luvin’

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

How old is the daugher? Is she old enough to decide for herself that cutting off relatives is just crazy in this type of circumstance?

I would maybe send her a note in a few weeks, just saying that you’re thinking of her and hope that the drama in the family doesn’t come in between yours and her friendship.

I would bet she is feeling embarrassed for her parents and embarrassed at the way they reacted.

Post # 4
12 posts
  • Wedding: August 2012

Sorry to hear it. Sounds like your uncle got what was coming to him though. Over sweets really? Undecided

I would probably try to make contact with daugther and let her know how you feel about the situation. Let her know that you were not trying to insult her, but that her father was creating a stressful situation and unfairly insulting your mother. I would make it clear that you were not trying to embarass her or anyone in your family, but maybe explain that your uncle was the one doing that.

If she has no interest in regenerating a relationship I’d leave it for a while. Maybe in the near future the situation will calm down and all parties will cool off. 

I think you handled it much better than I would have.

Good Luck! 

Post # 5
5823 posts
Bee Keeper

If she isn’t making any attempts to stay close, why bother?  Her dad sound controlling and she likely MUST take his side “or else.”  She probably would rather have a relationship (albeit a bad one) with her dad rather than a cousin.  Just let it go.  Maybe when you get a little older things will change.

Post # 7
345 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

bless you! that is so sad about your family situation.  I agree with what the first two posters have said, just send a nice, neutral message to the daughter and then it’s up to her whether she wants to have a relationship with you or not, chances are she won’t but at least you can say you’ve tried. poor you but chin up and now you know how NOT to act when in 20 years time your niece gets married!

Post # 8
772 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Sorry this happened!  It sounds like she is going to take her parents side.  I would reach out to her and let her know that you harbor no ill will against her, but realize if she remains friendly with you the trouble it will cause in her own family.

Post # 9
1489 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Thats alot going on and all I see is envy…. Im sure it will work itself out in due time


Post # 10
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Don’t write her off, just give her some time and then let her know you would like to continue a relationship with her. Or some gesture. Sometimes, in family drama, the people involved don’t get both sides fully, even when it’s hard to understand how they couldn’t.

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