Post # 1
My Maid/Matron of Honor added a note on the invites for my bridal shower stating it’d be easier if they shipped their gifts to me because I am living half way across the country. I’m on the fence about this. Prior to her adding this, I was just going to ship the gifts myself if people did not choose to do so on their own. I just feel bad asking people to pay for shipping. Doesn’t it seem rude or is it just me?
Post # 3
I agree with you. Even though it’s for a shower, I’d feel funny about having such a notice added to the invitations. Word-of-mouth would probably be more appropriate.
Post # 4
We ran into this issue when we had a big shower in Minnesota (we live in Texas). I don’t think anyone gave any specific instructions, but there was some word of mouth communication–if people asked for our address to ship a gift, someone gave it to them. Maybe 1/4 of the people shipped their gifts.
A big part of the shower is the actual present-opening, so a lot of people wanted to bring physical gifts. My ILs drove, so they took some home, but we shipped the other necessities back ourselves. I think we still have some stuff at my parents’ house in Minnesota–if there are things you wouldn’t use right away, maybe someone can store them for you temporarily.
Post # 5
Your hesitations are correct. As brides, if we accept a shower being thrown in our honor, we must bear the responsibility of transporting the gifts home.
Post # 6
I dont think the guests have to pay for ship it across the country.
Post # 7
If your gifts are from a registry off a store like Bed Bath and Beyond, you can return them all and buy them in the city by you. They will set it all up for you and make it super easy!
Post # 8
@futuremrsfitz18: I tend to agree. Plus, I would feel uncomfortable stating anything mre on invites about gifts than what’s absolutely necessary.
Post # 9
I agree. I would be embarassed if they did that. … I better have a chat with my Maid/Matron of Honor. I’m in a similiar boat. I think I will leave it all at my mom’s and then drive across the country for the wedding, so I can bring things back.
Post # 10
I think my aunt included an enclosure that said something like: The happy couple reside at XXX Address.
Most people sent their gifts, but for those that brought it to the shower, I just returned it to Macy’s and repurchased in NYC. No big deal. No way was I carting a cookie sheet and a salad bowl back on the plane.
Post # 11
My BMs did this, and I was super embarassed. All the guests I’ve talked to said it is fine, though. I still wish they wouldn’t have. I like those who suggested returning gifts & rebuying at your local store.
Post # 12
@louisianablue: Thanks that is helpful to know what you did in the similar situation. My dad talked to my grandpa and he said he wished my cousin would have provided guests with the option to ship. We discussed changing the wording to say, “for your convenience if you wish to ship gifts to the bride…..” or Maybe I will have my Maid/Matron of Honor use what your aunt did. That would maybe kind of clue people. My dad felt strongly that I should give people the option so no one feels awkward if they brought their gift, while others shipped. The way my Maid/Matron of Honor worded it is rude, so the wording does need to be revised.
Having to return all of the gifts and rebuy seems kind of like a hassle. At this point, I just need to decide if I want to have presents to open.