- 4 years ago
This not wedding related, but it’s is emotional related.
So I’m a regural BEE, but posting anonymously since I am very ashamed of this part of my life…
Anyway, I was hoping to get some advice and maybe some encouragement from everyone. I’ll make this as short as possible lol (still going to be long lol).
I think the title says it all (mostly). I didn’t finish high school… and this part of my life is extremely embarrasing to me. No one else knows about it other than my immediate family/relatives and of course my loving husband . All of my friends doesn’t know about it. The reason I did not finish high school is because of moving to a different country. I just turned 14 when we moved to this certain country. At that time, there weren’t a lot of foreigners/half race/mixed race children in the city we lived in, which made it a lot more difficult. By the age of 15, I started school again, but the language barrier made it very difficult, and not just that, the teachers weren’t used to handling students that couldn’t speak the language. There were times where my teacher would get mad at me because I didn’t do a certain chore or thing. How was I supposed to know when she didn’t explain it to me?! I was able to speak English by then, so I was assigned to a teacher who can also speak English, but there were times where she wouldn’t or forget to explain certain things to me in English, then get mad when I didn’t do what I was supposed to do because I didn’t understand anything (she wasn’t always so bad though, just unexperienced with my situation). Of course, there were bullies as well. Although there were some nice students who tried to be friends with me; the language barrier, teacher getting mad and the bullies were just overwhelming. It was very difficult for me at that age, and I would cry almost everyday; sometimes, while on a break at school, everyone would play or just do some fun stuff, while I stay on my seat crying. It was an experience that I still couldn’t get over with. In the end, I couldn’t handle it and decided to quit. My parents felt my pain and supported me 100%.
After a while, I decided to work instead. A few years later, I got tired of my job and went to the US for the first time and took some classes (by this time, I was already able to speak the language and call the country that I moved to at the age of 14 my HOME). I obtained my certificates after I took those classes. I went back home and used these certificates to further my education and career. I started at the bottom since I was the youngest in this field of work. At least 90% of those who work in the same field as me all have bachelors degree. I succeeded due to hard work, experience, being friendly to everyone, lots of prayers and maybe a little bit of luck. I worked in this field for almost 8 years both part time and full time.
Now I’m married, and have been married for almost 2 years, but just moved to the US less than a year ago (I stayed back home to work and save some more money while my husband went on deployment and while we wait for my US visa). Although it’s not my first time being in the US, it’s still a little nerve racking since I will be here for good. I have a great life and a great husband. We both saved up enough before getting married, now we have a very comfortable life and a beautiful home of our own. I’m very successful on some aspect of my life, but I still feel like a failure. A couple of nights ago, my husband asked me if I feel like a successful woman; I said no, and he asked why? he said I have a great life, I have a house, I have him and we are very happy. I said that’s different, I’m still not educated and still haven’t finish high school. I felt bad saying that to him; I don’t think he was offended (maybe), but I feel like I was being offensive :(. I do make sure that he is happy all the time though, and I love him more than anything, and he always tells me that it will be ok. Now here I am starting all over again thinking that I might not be able to get a job since I don’t have a high school diploma. Sometimes I wish that my husband would get assigned back home so that I can take the high school thing slow while I work in the field that I am familiar with. Now I’m studying so that I can take the GED test ASAP and go to college and also find a decent job, since I know they always ask for high school diplomas here despite being experienced or having other types of certificates. I really feel stupid and dumb! and wish I had suck it up, but being a teenager in that situation was not easy. I don’t know how long this studying will take and it’s very stressful! I have big dreams, but my life experience delayed all that for me, and now it’s stressing me out big time and don’t even know where to start sometimes :(.
Bees with GED experience or those who had to get a high school diploma later in life, do you have any advice? I’d appreciate any help!
- This topic was modified 4 years ago by stillme82.