- 3 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
I have been unemployed since December. I have been collecting unemployment benefits since then. The money from that is almost as much as what he has been bringing in.
The thing is, my husband refuses to acknowledge that money as a contribution… Almost like it doesn’t even count, when the truth is, it’s been saving our butts every month.
He works hard everyday and he is the breadwinner, fine. I am responsible for most of the housework while he agreed to help sometimes only.
I will admit, this SAHW business isn’t exactly my forte… I find it depressing and hard to be motivated; I’d much rather be bringing home a “real” paycheck so needless to say, I haven’t been working up to my or his standards. But I do get some things done, so it’s not like I am sitting on my butt all day. Just last year, my husband was the unemployed one and the tables were reversed (except he quit his job and was not receiving any money from the government) and he was like me (no saint at home, but managed to get some things done). He focused more on dishes and cooking whereas I am more of an organizer/cleaner than a cooker/kitchen person. When he was unemployed, I never complained and gave him A LOT of slack for dragging his feet around the house. I wish he would do the same now that I am unemployed (only until April 21 when I start my new job woooooo!).
Last night we got in a fight over dinner and he was so insensitive (granted, so was I, but I have since then apologized and admitted where I went wrong). He said things like “now I know you will never truly be a SAHW…”, “at least I made sure you had a cooked meal everynight” geeez, I thought I meant more to him. Where he lacked in cleaning, he made up for in cooking and where I lack in cooking, make up for in cleaning.
It doesn’t help that we have a dog and brand new puppy that I am left with chasing after every day.
What really gets to me, is that he refuses to acknowledge my EI (pogi, lol) as an actual financial contribution… Does it not count for anything? If that money just suddenly vanished from our lives every month, well I bet it would be missed, lol. Am I wrong to think that it should AT LEAST get acknowledged?
Since I am home all day, fine, I will assume most, if not all, of the household responsibilities (even if I kinda suck at it, like he did), but don’t you ignore and undermind my financial contributions to this home! AAARRRGH. Lol.
We are so much better together when we both work and both take care of the household… ugh. Bees, please don’t flame me too much, or do it with sensitivity.
I just need some wisdom and womanly advice 🙁