Post # 1
Bridesmaid dillemma. I think my brain has had it with decision making… I need some advice!
I have 2 sisters, groom has 2 brothers and a sister and two nephews. We decided we want all family in the bridal party. 2 sisters on my side and 2 brothers on his side. 2 ring bearer nephews. What do we do with his sister?
The issues at hand: how they walk down the aisle and dress color/style
Walking down the aisle: My sister #1 matched with his brother #1, my sister #2 matched with his brother #2. His sister alone followed by ring bearers OR his sister walking two very young nephew ring bearers down the aisle. Would she stand on his side or my side? or sit with the two very young ring bearers? (Groom doesn’t want to ask another man to be a groomsman to make it even.) also – its not a church ceremony, its in the venue in a sort of unconventional space.
Dress colors: I want to make this as simple as possible: his sister and my sisters live in different states and it is too late to order bridesmaid dresses at bridal salon without paying a rush fee. Its an evening wedding, so long dresses preferred. My dress is ivory with some silver detail beading. I thought to have my two sisters in dark red, his sister in a pink OR my sisters in red and his sister in a more neutral color or pewter. Or they should all wear the same dress that I choose at a big department store like macys or nordstroms. Or can I ask each to find their own dark red dress – though make sure that they match reds. Too many options!
Anyone in a similar dillemma? What are your thoughts?
Post # 3
My first suggestion would be have them wear the same color. If you like the different colors, have your Maid/Matron of Honor, wear the different color and have her walk down the aisle just before the ring bearers.
I don’t think I would single out the SIL to wear a different color and walk by herself, unless she is your Maid/Matron of Honor. Presumably, you would want one of your sisters as Maid/Matron of Honor. But if you can’t decide between the sisters, and plan on not specifying one as your Maid/Matron of Honor, I really think they should all wear the same color.
Post # 4
I think it’s perfectly fine to have uneven bridesmaids. The 2nd groomsmen could walk down 2 bms at once. I’ve seen it done and don’t think it is strange at all. Actually, it’s kind of cute and she could stand on our side.
As for dresses, j.crew or anntaylor offers some nice dresses that are normal sizes. Your bms won’t have to tailor them! So all your bms can wear the same dress since they can purchase it in their hometown. Nordstroms, Bloomingdales also has some nice dresses that are bridesmaid-like. I would say online is the way to go if you want your maids to wear the same dress. If you let them pick their own, the shade might all be different.
Post # 5
I think that they should either all wear the same dress or all wear different dresses, so that your SIL doesn’t stick out. (And I’m not a fan of having the Maid/Matron of Honor be different than the other bridesmaids.)
As far as walking down the asile, I like the idea of having one groomsman escort two bridesmaids. The other thing I might consider would be having everyone walk back out alone, starting with one of the girls. I know it’s not traditional, but it’s certainly an option.
Also, I’m not sure that your ring bearers normally walk out with the procession. I know with the kids in my wedding I’m willing to wrangle them up the asile once, but then they’re done. (Then again, mine are 4…)
Post # 6
Maybe you should ask her if she has a preferance for which side to stand on. I would love to stand by my brothers side at his wedding. Also see who she wants to walk with. There is no wrong way to do it. I don’t see any need to differentiate her dress. I think you are over thinking it a bit. I couldn’t tell you how the people walked down the aisle at the last wedding I went to, and I know it has been done different at nearly every wedding I have been to. IMO the only thing that matters is that you and your man end up up there.
Post # 7
Our bridal party is uneven as well. I have 6 and he has 4. We are having my fiancee and his groomsmen all entering together from the side of the church (I’ve also seen it done this way for a non-church wedding). The bridesmaids will walk down the aisle by themselves. The last two groomsmen will double up with my bridesmaids on the way out of the church.
Post # 8
- Wedding: May 2018 - Our home and the two acres it sits on
I agree that you’re probably better off having a Groomsmen walk with two BMs. People tend to be a little uncomfortable walking alone! And really, what a lucky Groomsmen, ya know?
Post # 9
I tend to agree with a lot of what was said…consistancy in color is a good idea, and since people are scattered, maybe stick with a simple color that will have little variation from store to store. and staying with a large chain may be a good way to do that.
As far as who to walk down where, I think the two Bridesmaid or Best Man & 1 Groomsmen could be cute…or I also like the idea of her walking down with the ring bearers, assuming it’s not too degrading. We were thinking of doing something similar…my fiance has 2 nieces, one whose 4 and one whose 12, and we were going to have the 12 y/o walk down the flower girl & ring bearer. Though, she is 12 and not an adult, so that may make a big difference.
Also, there’s nothing wrong with talking to your SIL and ask what she would feel comfortable with. Run a few ideas by her (maybe the ideas YOU like the most) and have her share what she’d feel the best with. It sounds like you do want to consider her feelings, which is great, and going to her directly to ask is a good way to do that! 🙂