Post # 1
As of this morning, Darling Husband and I have just started our 14th cycle of TTC with no success. We had testing done a few months ago and no issues were found with either of us. I’m as regular as can be – I O the same day every month, have a 27 day cycle and 14 day LP. I’m at a complete loss and I don’t know how to proceed. This morning really hit me hard and I broke down completely, which I haven’t done in months. I’ve been able to stay hopeful but suddenly I just feel so dejected. In my heart, I want to have faith that it’ll happen when the time is right, but in my head, my brain says if you repeat the same thing 13 times, why would you expect a different result this time?
So, the point of this post is for some success stories from those who have suffered with unexplained infertility. I think this is the hardest part for me – that there supposedly isn’t anything that can be fixed. People tell me about other people who have taken a while to get pregnant but then they tell me about the issues that they had to fix in order for it to work. Unfortunately, that just scares me more. If we don’t have anything to fix but Darling Husband and I aren’t making a baby, then why would I think we ever could?
I posted this in pregnancy even though it relates to TTC because I’m hoping that some of you pg bees maybe have some success stories you could share. If you suffered from unexplained infertility, how did you ultimately get pregnant?
Post # 3
I just wanted to let you know that I’m thinking of you often and I know in my heart that you will get your sweet baby soon. <3
Post # 4
@MrsMaskatoBe: Thanks so much for the kind words. Hope you’re feeling good and all prepped for baby boy to arrive! 🙂
Post # 5
I have a good friend who was TTC for over a year with no success. She and her husband had some testing done and the doctors couldn’t figure out why it wasn’t happening. They weren’t ready to consider any high-level interventions or adoption yet so decided to take a TTC break (quit charting etc.) over the holidays and then re-evaluate their next steps in the new year.
… And during their “break,” BAM, pregnant. They now have a healthy son!
I know people hate the “just relax and it will happen” advice/stories, but I wanted to give you some hope.
Post # 6
@hardtoconcentrate: I don’t have any advise as I am pretty much on the same boat as you. I just wanted to send you the biggest virtual hugs. I saw your chart this morning :(( I hope some bee has a great success story to share!
Post # 7
I am so sorry you are having to go through this, I can only imagine how difficult it must be. My sister had the exact same problem, they were trying for close to a year without any luck and without any explanations. They decided to take some time off and went travelling together – she said she was able to let the stress of TTC go and, shortly after returning home, she found out she was pregnant! Her second pregnancy happened much quicker and she now has 2 beautiful little girls!
Don’t give up hope, I am keeping my fingers crossed that you get your BFP soon!
Post # 8
@MrsR4ever: Thanks, my dear. I’ve been a mess all day – off and on tears since I woke up. I know you can relate. I hope we both see those two lines one day very soon.
@PeachBee: Thanks so much for sharing that….it gives me hope. It’s reassuring to hear of others who took a little longer than average but who it still happened for. Thanks for the encouragement.
@sailor: That definitely does give me hope. Thank you for that – it’s just what I needed.
Post # 9
@hardtoconcentrate: My heart sunk when I saw who wrote this post. I don’t have anything to add, but I just wanted to reply that I wish I could give you the biggest bear hug. I lurk on the TTC boards every now and then wishing that I won’t see you on there. Like MrsMaskatoBe, I think of you often and know you’ll be getting that BFP soon. xoxoxox
Post # 10
Sorry you’re going through this, that must be so frustrating. I have a friend who tried for over a year, normal testing for her and her husband, then they did IUI and got pregnant the first cycle. So basically, they have no idea why it didn’t work prior to then, but they did end up getting pregnant as soon as they started seeing an REI. Good luck!
Post # 11
@hardtoconcentrate: so sorry you’re having so much trouble. In my readings about IVF, I came across some info about how sometimes unexplained infertility turned out to be because the mother had an abnormal immune response to the pregnancy and the body attacks the embryo. This doctor gives all his IVF patients a course of steriods to prevent that response. He’s had success with women dx with unexplained infertility getting pregnant after the steriods.
Have you been seeing an RE?
Post # 12
I understand your concerns. I only want to say that there were no problem with my parents but it still took almost 6 years before my mom got pregnant. Don’t stop believing your time will come, even if it is really hard. It can happen any cycle!
Post # 13
Hi lovely lady, my heart is hurting for you. I know your situation well, and has a similar one myself, in that doctors kept saying we were both fine (even though I had wonky cycles). Would you/have you tried some natural approaches? For me I think it was just a few hormones that needed rebalancing, and hubby had to get a bit healthier, both of which we addressed with a naturopath. And I there was something amazing about being listened to and respected that I wasn’t getting from my doctors, too! We would have been sent through exploratory procedures and medicines if it wasn’t for our naturo, and they probably would have labeled it “unexplained fertility”.
I liked the book Making Babies for opening my eyes to eastern approaches (without ruling out western medicine).
I know how patient you’ve been – I’ve been desperately hoping for your happy announcement!! All the best xx
Post # 14
I was also bummed to see the author of this post 🙁 I am so sorry, it has to be even more frustrating with no definitive answer to what’s wrong. I don’t have a personal story, but I know my brother and his wife were in the same situation–had all the tests run and couldn’t find a problem with either of them. They tried for 2 years I think, then just proceeded with infertility treatments, starting with Clomid (still no luck), IUI (didn’t work either) and then finally IVF (got 3 embryos that were “good enough” to transfer and one stuck). They basically exhausted all of any savings they had to get ONE child, and there was nothing wrong with either of them that doctors could find. That may not have been what you wanted to hear as far as a success story, bit they DID end up getting their baby, it was just a very long and incredibly expensive road.
Since it took so much to get their first, they never really planned on having a second because they couldn’t afford to do IVF again…three years later they got pregnant naturally with their second. So obviously nothing was ever really wrong with them, for some unknown reason they just couldn’t get pregnant naturally the first time. Maybe it would have happened if they kept waiting, but they just got so tired of waiting they decided to pursue fertility treatments, and I think their doctors approved even though they couldn’t find anything “wrong” with them.
I really hope you get your BFP soon, you deserve it so much! I think about you often and still stalk your chart Sometimes. Hang in there and let me know if there’s anything I can do.
Post # 15
You ladies have reminded me why I love this place so much. Thank you all for the caring responses – it means the world right now.
@aalliep: Hi there! I was just thinking of you the other day and how you are finally in the long-awaited 3rd trimester! I’m so happy for you that you’re able to relax and know your sticky baby will be in your arms very soon. Thank you for the post – I think of you often. 🙂
@ZoeyGirl: That’s good to know. IUI is the next step if we choose to go that route. I’m not sure if I want to spend the money on it when the success rate doesn’t seem that great but hearing another success story from it gives me some hope.
@MrsPaulsBabyBallerina: Thank you – that’s great info about the RE and the steroid treatment. I haven’t been to an RE yet because my gyn did all my testing. We just moved to a new state so I don’t even have a gyn in my new location yet. That is the next step, though. I found a local RE today and am calling my old gyn in the morning to see if she can refer me. Baby steps – no pun intended. 🙂
@Black_bird: Thank you for the encouragement. Wow, 6 years? That must have been very trying on them. That does give me hope that it still can happen.
@hamikay: Hi! I’m so glad you responded – I was actually planning to PM you. I was thinking of you today and how effective the naturopath was for you. You tried for something like 15 months, right? I’m very interested in the naturopath route and have thought about that a lot today. I’m not even sure where to begin though because I’ve never been down this road before. Did you just look up naturopaths or were you referred? And I can’t remember, did you do acupuncture too or just the naturopath?
@cowgirlace: Thanks, love. Honestly, success at this point of any type gives me hope. I’ve sort of lost the ability to see it for myself, so even hearing about financially draining IVF success gives me hope that we hopefully can have a baby some day one way or another. And then they got pg naturally?! That’s crazy. Thanks for sharing. And you….you’re in the home stretch now, right?! Enjoy the last trimester and, if I remember correctly, the baby boy, right?? Can’t wait to see pics – I’m sure he’ll be beautiful. 🙂
Post # 16
@hardtoconcentrate: The book I read was very informative about all the different options for medical interventions to make babies. I’m a good year away from starting IVF but from what I’ve seen here (and on HelloBee) is that RE’s can sometimes assume a certain level of understanding in their patients, but in reality, you’re scared and confused and can’t even think of the right questions to ask because really, what little girl dreams of having babies via IUI or IVF, let alone knowing the ins and outs of how the process works? Anyways, the book is called “In Vitro Fertilization: The A.R.T (assistive reproductive thechnology) of Making Babies” by Dr. Geoffrey Sher. He explains a lot about infertility causes, the different treatment options, how to find a good RE, etc. I feel like it gives me some knowledge of the process to be able to ask questions. I hate finding myself thinking of what I should have asked hours later after being emotionally overwhelmed by what the doctor just told me.
I hope you get your baby sooner rather than later!