(Closed) Unhelpful fiance…please regale me with your tales

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1183 posts
Bumble bee

I was the one sounding like your Fiance. 

I didn’t mind part of the planning but every conversation we had people kept asking about the wedding and Fiance would ask my opinions on lots. I dread to think how many times I said “I’m not bothered”. DH and I joke we’re not having a vow renewal any time soon. 

Post # 3
Member
700 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

He wants to be involved but it actually came time for our appointment with the florist he pouted like a child and said “We’ll just do whatever you want because you’ll just get mad at me if I make a suggestion”…the lip was out and everything. I rolled my eyes and told him to stop acting like a child. 

Post # 4
Member
1583 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

My Fiance is in charge of music, so as long as he plays me a song occasionally I consider him on top of his part of planning. The only annoying thing he’s done is to say “yeah we’ll do that soon” whenever I remind him of something where his input is needed – rings, his outfit, travel vaccinations, you name it! I was like, “soon” is NOT a time. 

Post # 5
Member
3437 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017 - Poppy Ridge Golf Course

Your full government name as a username is not a wise idea. Especially when your FB photos match. I hope your Fiance and anyone he knows doesn’t use this site. But in response to your post Fiance is more involved than he was before now that he sees how much work planning a wedding can be but he’s not super involved. He’s good at picking between multiple choices but if its one option I’ll get the, “Whatever you want dear.” response.

Post # 6
Member
655 posts
Busy bee

Lolllllll my fiancé tries to do the whole *looks deeply into my eyes* “as long as I’m marrying you, I don’t care where the wedding is.”

 

like okay, thank you for that but we’re talking about either a destination wedding or one 2 miles from our house so those are very different things and you’re not going to get out of having an opinion on this. But you can keep saying sweet things… 😜

Post # 7
Member
429 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
heavenlyflower :  yeah hope OP knows that all these posts are public… Like you don’t even have to be a member to see them :/ 

Post # 8
Member
2691 posts
Sugar bee

Mine had the best comeback ever when I complained about his lack of participation. He said, “I’m signing those checks though…” And yeah, that was the end of that argument.

Post # 9
Member
367 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Planning went mostly ok, but I’m still irked about this other thing… I couldn’t find a fake garland that I liked, so I ended up buying sprays of foilage and flowers separately. I then dismantled all the parts of the fakes, attached floral wire and then twisted them into my very own garland. It took hours and my fingers hurt. But they looked great! Cut to wedding day, where now DH carefully set them out… Up. Side. Down. The flowers on the bottom and all the wires exposed on top. Didn’t notice till afterwards. Ugh. Ridiculous. At least they look great on our mantle now!

Post # 14
Member
2195 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

DH was a student for most of our engagement, so I picked up more because of that. However, when he wasn’t studying I expected him to chip in equally. We’d sometimes watch Don’t Tell the Bride (the TV crew gives the groom the budget for the wedding and he decides everything in three weeks, including dress, without talking at all to his partner) and he would get annoyed with the bride’s who were upset with things not happening they way they wanted them. He would grumble ‘it’s the groom’s day too’. So when he started saying ‘it’s up to you’ then I reminded him of that.

This is also the first marriage for both of us. So when he said ‘I don’t know what I’m doing’ and I responded with ‘and how many f**king weddings do you think I’ve planned? If you don’t know, google. That’s what I’m doing’. After that he took my hint and helped out loads. We treated like household chores because that’s what it was to both of us. He ended up taking on several things with no input from me and sharing several things with me, it worked out great.

Post # 15
Member
484 posts
Helper bee

My Fi is doing no work in terms of research, contacting vendors, etc, yet he wants to have the final say on every decision. He basically wants me to curate all the info and bring it to him on a platter. I reminded him I’m not his paid wedding planner that he can say “nope, don’t like it” to all the time. If you don’t like it then you find something else! 

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