Post # 1
Member
290 posts
Helper bee
Hi all,
I am so happy! It is so amazing when you meet the love of your life, everything falls into place. He already commented that we are unofficially engaged, and that we will make it official around our 1 year anniversary because we do not want our family members to gossip about us.
It is true that when a man truly loves a woman, committment is not scary at all and a man is not afraid to talk about the future.
He already told me that by early next year (January, February), we are going to the custom made jewelry place that we know and design my e-ring! He already saw a picture of the ring I want and told me is beautiful! And based on several conversations, I know that I will be engaged sometime between March and May.
They are no doubts, questions and insecurities related to how we feel for each other and where we are going. We already discussed possible venues of where the wedding will be, the hotel guests can stay!
It is now just a matter of time to make it official!
Post # 3
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
no that is not true. love comes in all shapes and sizes and meaning. To you it meant marriage to some true love doesn’t mean that. Nor does it mean all men truely in love enjoy talking about the future.
Post # 4
Member
3142 posts
Sugar bee
@vmec:
Agreed. What the OP decribed can also be decribed as the ‘honeymoon phase’.
@KS240030:
you don’t want your family members to gossip? About what? You getting engaged too soon?
Post # 5
Member
1562 posts
Bumble bee
Sometimes a man can truly love a woman and not be ready for marriage. Or not be ready to talk about the future. Some men are just like that.
Post # 7
Member
870 posts
Busy bee
@KS240030: It is true that when a man truly loves a woman, committment is not scary at all and a man is not afraid to talk about the future.
No. I know because I really love my Boyfriend or Best Friend but I wasn’t not ready to talk about our future and committment was scary until about 2 years ago. I felt I was too young to know myself and him well enough to take that step.
People are different and there is no one forumla that is going to equal “true love” for eveyone.
(Frankly I still feel the same way about babies! I love them to death, and I know I want them, but the idea of actually having one freaks me out!)
Post # 8
Member
792 posts
Busy bee
@Taylor4: I agree with you there – the first year and a half of our relationship my OH and I were at university and felt too young and too busy to talk about getting married, then the next six months we were so busy moving to a new city, finding full times jobs and generally settling into our new life that we didn’t talk about it, it didn’t mean we didn’t love each other like crazy. It’s only now that I feel that we are ‘waiting’.
Post # 9
Member
290 posts
Helper bee
I do not mean to offend anyone. This is my own personal opinion and anybody is free to disagree with me. I just wanted to put on paper how I am feeling. This is my own personal story and I know there are men who do not like to talk about the future or committment, but I just happen to meet a man who is not afraid of talking about it and that is one of the reasons why I love him.
He has been very open with me of what he wants in life and I do not like playing games. Our core values are the same and that is why we were on the same page from the very beginning. We both know what we want in life and we go and get it.
That is just us. I apologize if I offended anyone.
@Oneeleven: Yes, both of our families believe in about 1 year of dating before being officially engaged. I know that sounds crazy but we want to respect our families tradition.
Post # 10
Member
2893 posts
Sugar bee
Congrats! This is very exciting news! 🙂
Post # 11
Member
3297 posts
Sugar bee
- Wedding: August 2013 - An amazing non-profit retreat
OP, I’m not really sure why you’re getting snarky comments from some of the bees. This place sometimes is just a drama fest waiting to happen.
Anyways, I am happy for you, and I agree with waiting at least a year before engagement.
Post # 12
Member
64 posts
Worker bee
@sherryberry: I agree.
@KS240030: Congrats! That’s wonderful news 😀 Enjoy this time.
Post # 13
Member
215 posts
Helper bee
Ladies, remember that we all have our different opinions on what love means to us, and that’s completely cool! We’d all be boring if we were the same. 😛
Congratulations on your unofficial engagement! I am unofficially engaged as well, and quite honestly, when I was deemed as such, that’s when I got REALLY antsy! EEP! Just keep yourself busy and have a great time enjoying not having the stress of planning the perfect wedding just quite yet! 😛 Blessings!
Post # 14
Member
273 posts
Helper bee
Honeymoon Phase !! 100% :D…..nothing wrong with it at all and congratulations! I just remember the first year me and my bf were dating (i thought nobody had a love like we had), then you go through the period where you realize nobody is perfect, then you come to terms with it and love eachother even with all the faults!
I only think people were making snarky remarks because she wrote:
“It is true that when a man truly loves a woman, committment is not scary at all and a man is not afraid to talk about the future.”
while of course we know this is obviously not true, and that there are many other factors that come into play when two people make the decision to commit to eachother–some people don’t necessary feel the “rush” to get married (for whatever reason whether it be financial, time and place in life etc), other people may be more impulsive…just depends on the couple and doesn’t define whether or not your man “truly” loves you.
Post # 16
Member
5011 posts
Bee Keeper
@smiles731: In defence of “the honeymoon phase”, we just passed two and a half years and I don’t love him any less than I did on day one. Heck! We’re still as nauseating as we ever were. For some people the honeymoon phase goes on forever.
