(Closed) Unplugged wedding ceremony (advice/rant)

posted 4 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 106
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee

I am 100% having an unplugged ceremony. If you can’t be respectful and put your damn camera phone away for 15 minutes, then don’t come.

I’m paying good money for our wedding photographer and I don’t want their professional shots getting ruined by photobombs and flash.

The officiant is going to say something before the ceremony starts.

Post # 107
Member
1165 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

When we plan our wedding I am 100% all for making it an unplugged ceremony. The reception I don’t care about at all, they can take all the pictures they want. But I see nothing wrong with asking guests to put their phones away. I consider it rude and a disctraction. I plan on having a professional photographer and do not want a bunch of cell phone screens in my pictures. My guests can survive without using their technology for a brief period of time. 

I immediately thought of the article Gatsbybride2016 posted. I’d be pretty peeved if that was my wedding. 

Post # 108
Member
2015 posts
Buzzing bee

I get what some PPs are saying about the guests being adults and not having to be told what not to do, however unfortunately sometimes they do. A week ago a guest at my cousin’s wedding snapped a pic of her and posted it on Facebook…before she headed down the aisle and before the groom had seen her. Guess who got a little bored sitting around waiting for the girls to be ready and jumped on Facebook for a minute to post a status about how happy he was that the day had finally arrived that he gets to marry his best friend? Fortunately he didn’t see the picture the guest had posted but he easily could have if he had scrolled down just a tad. It’s just common sense really. The entire ceremony was like a sea of phones…many of them in bulky, bright coloured, ugly cases. The photographer actually told me he had to think fast and reposition himself so he didn’t have all of these random colours and shapes in the pro shots. This guy isn’t cheap so you would hope he could focus on getting the perfect shots and making sure he catches the right moments instead of having to worry about what NOT to capture. Seriously, you can’t go 20 minutes without snapping a picture? It reeks of entitlement. Unless the bride and groom requested you take photos of their ceremony, you don’t f*cking need them so badly that you affect the pro shots. Wait until the reception. If you’re really so close to the couple that you want to capture the memories then I’m sure they would feel close enough to you that they’ll give you a copy of the pro shots.

Post # 110
Member
11654 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

No one in my circle would bat an eye at being told not to take pictures, in fact it’s assumed that this is the rule. (I am not friends with teenagers, though, and since this rebellion about being told what to do sounds really childish, that could be the issue.) And just because certain bees don’t understand it doesn’t make it any less true.

Luckily for the world, it’s not up to the few self-appointed arbiters of everyone else’s weddings, who ironically get peevish at the mere notion of someone telling others what to do.

Post # 111
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017 - Canvas Event Space

Personally, I loved the idea the second I heard of it and I’m all for unplugged weddings – and I say this as someone admittedly addicted to my phone.

I know it’s not really the same thing but I went to a concert last year where the band made everyone check their phones at the door – it was a really big band doing a handful of small clubs about a week or so before their new album came out and I can honestly say that it was something really special. I’ve never seen an audience so engaged! 

When I first heard of unplugged weddings I immediately thought of that show and what a difference it made there and could imagine it being somewhat similar at a wedding.

Post # 112
Member
316 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I’ve decided during the 15 minute beach ceremony to have an unplugged ceremony and then for the receptions, it’s a free for all. I don’t really foresee that being a problem since we’re only inviting 20 people for our destination wedding. But it would be soooo obnoxious walking down the aisle and there’s a billion camera flashes going off.

Post # 113
Member
356 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

We are going to do this too because we want our guests to relax and not watch the ceremony theough their phones. Also, it looks very tacky in photos of you and your groom up there getting married with people raising their phones and half standing to get the shot or leaning into the aisle. I will personally make sure everyone gets their photos. We are going to put this in a “wedding events program” everyone will get when they arrive to the hotel, and our officiant will remind everyone before the processional but will end it with a joke saying “if [dad] can do it you can too” bc everyone knows my dad is a workaholic always on his phone so it will add a bit of humor. If you do that announcement then your Mother-In-Law will look like an ass if she still breaks out the camera. 

Post # 114
Member
461 posts
Helper bee

I don’t see the big deal with guests taking photos. It’s nice that they’re wanting to capture your big day.

I wasn’t aware people had unplugged weddings. Infact I’d never heard of it before joining the Bee. If someone asked me not to take photos my honest first thought would be – who do you think you are?

Post # 115
Member
3438 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

bdjhxo:  Well, they are the bride and groom. People who cared enough about you to invite you to their wedding, and who you care enough about to accept the invitation and attend. If it matters enough to them to request people not photograph their ceremony, wouldn’t you respect them enough to honor their wishes?

It’s not about controlling adults, it’s about creating a specific kind of experience. Nobody has an unplugged wedding because they just get a kick out of telling others what to do. 

Post # 116
Member
534 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Also planning to have an unplugged ceremony. I don’t want to see a bunch of iPhones. I also don’t want to see a bunch of phones in my pro pics. Its also a pet peeve of mine when people immediately post those pics on Facebook! 

I think it’s a perfectly acceptable request. 

Post # 117
Member
461 posts
Helper bee

MiniMeow:  I understand that people don’t want to see phones being shoved in the air but never in my life have I been to a wedding where that has happened. But if someone made a point of coming to me to say I can’t take photos then thats what I would think – not gonna lie.

Post # 118
Member
427 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

 

ellep91010:  We are doing unplugged as well for our ceremony. Mainly because we are having a candlelit ceremony, so our photographers are already having to work with that, and I don’t everyone using their flash on their phones. I guess we shall see how it turns out!

Post # 119
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

bostonbride2016:  

I love the wedding event package idea. That’s brilliant! 

Post # 120
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

bdjhxo:  I think part of the reason that this is even a conversation is because many people have. I certainly have. I’ve seen it at weddings, at concerts, at dance performances, AFTER CAR ACCIDENTS! We’re obsessed. If your camera isn’t up in the air then you’re looking down trying to capture a moment or leaning over trying not to fall out of your seat. Either way, you’re not giving your attention and energy to the people you’re there to see. 

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