Post # 46
I’m doing this also. I hate at other weddings I’ve been to where everyone has their phone out taking pictures. I do think it’s rude and distracting as a guest. I don’t want to be distracted by it when I’m the bride! I don’t think anyone is going to be offended by us requesting no photos, they are our friends and family. If you think it’s going to affect you or how you hope your photos turn out, then do it.
Post # 47
We told people no photography during the ceremony. Because our main concern was people holding up phones and iPads and such, ruining the shots for the pro photographers. We put the announcement on our website and told people we would be sharing our professional photos after the fact. And our officiant made an announcement. I think it is a totally reasonable request. I wouldlnt tell people to turn OFF their phones, I wasn’t trying to like police them from texting during our ceremony or whatever.
Post # 48
I love the idea but I think it’s too overbearing. Guests are adults and shouldn’t be told what to do. Additionally, they want to take pictures because they love you and are excited. As much as I’d like them to sit their iPad toting butts down and let my very expensive photographer do the photographing, I just don’t think there’s any way to not hurt at least a few feelings, and that’s not worth it to me.
Post # 49
I think that generally, adults should not be told to do anything that is not your place to tell them. What to wear, what gift to bring, and other things that do not really affect you or your event or are not your business to dictate fall into that category.
But when things have gotten to the point of literal disruption, I think a host of an private event has every right to make a simple request. The photos are also a potential invasion of privacy. It is no different than if you were in someone’s home and they asked you not to take their picture at that particular time. It’s a courtesy, not an insult.
If churches and other venues can request no photography for any number of reasons, so can hosts.
Post # 50
My thoughts: I recently went to the first wedding I’ve attended where guests were asked to unplug for the ceremony only. Afer seeing how it went, I will do this hands down. I didn’t see phones in everyone’s faces, and only one person got a vibrating phone call during that time.
Also, based on how my family is (they are the people that cross the velvet rope at museums to take better pictures, EEK), this will need to be plainly told to my family. They even crossed certain boundaries at a recent graduation to get better pictures WITH FLASH. It was humiliating to the family member graduating, even though their pictures came out great. I guess my point is to know your guests and act accordingly, even if it comes off slightly rude….they will forgive you for it as long as you aren’t outrageous about it.
Post # 51
I’m not a fan and won’t be doing this for my wedding. I know that some family members will take pictures during the ceremony and I’m really fine with that. If I end up with photos of me walking down in to a sea of phones, so be it. I have two photographers I’m confident will be able to capture all the moments I want, and let my older family members take a few of their own.
I’m completely okay with seeing a note on a couple’s website requesting no photography during the ceremony, they will share their professional photos. It feels more honest. I’m not a picture taker at all so pulling out my phone at a wedding ceremony, or at any event, doesn’t register. With that said, it rubs me the wrong way to trot out the officiant to give some cutesy message that you are requesting no pictures so I can be in the moment…It’s kind of condescending. At least in my opinion.
Post # 52
applesandspice: what about in the case of not having a website? I have to make it known somehow..
Post # 53
My opinion on the matter is that cell phones are a mark of the era. I love old photographs of people using the technology of their day. Right now it’s tacky, but in many years to come, photos of guests taking pics with their iPhones will be really great to look (and laugh) at.
Post # 54
lightchaser: I agree. But that’s personal preference. I hate the way that everyone’s nose is always in their phones. I don’t want to look at photos of my guests at my ceremony and see every single one of them holding up a phone and poor grandma trying to get a view past all the phones and ipads!
Post # 55
zoey0317: Word of mouth? If I were doing something like this that’s probably the way I would go about it. I mean, there’s really no good way of telling adults how to behave. And there’s really no way of stopping anyone from taking pictures. If you would like to have an unplugged wedding you’ll have to be direct about it in some way. Whether it’s mentioned on a website, in a program, or read by an officiant. Like I mentioned in my post, I really don’t mind the main message “no pictures”, I do tend to roll my eyes hard when the message is not to take pictures so the photographer can capture my smiling face in the crowd and I can remain in the moment when you get married.
Post # 56
I was disappointed unexpectantly by photographer images and was so happy I had friends pics to get me through, they got better shots than the photographers! I did get some “ruined” shots where my aunt was in the damn aisle and I wish someone had told her to sit down!! But honestly she can be cropped out of most of them and if my photographers were more on it they should have been able to get angles without her in them. The other phones were there but not obnoxious or taking away from the pics in any way. I would have regretted way more to have an unplugged wedding and not have the beautiful pics my guests captured. You might want to tell a few trusted friends that if they see anyone near them jumping in the aisle or anything crazy to kindly tone it down lol
Post # 57
zoey0317: Yep, I had an unplugged ceremony and was super happy I did! I didn’t want to see everyone’s cell phone’s in front of their faces when I was walking down the aisle, and I didn’t want my professional pics showing everyone leaning into the aisle to get a photo. I wanted to see our guest’s faces. There was one person who didn’t see the sign (my officiant should have said something, but didn’t) and had her camera out taking pictures. I didn’t notice it at the time, and she felt horrible afterwards.
The other reason, is that my husband and I are private and I didn’t want a bunch of photos of our ceremony on facebook so hundreds of people I don’t even know could see. It was too intimate of a moment with a lot of emotion that I wanted to keep only between the people we invited and chose to share that moment with.
One thing I would do different would be to have someone set aside a cell phone just to record the audio of the ceremony. I had a videographer and thought I was covered. He didn’t want to give me all the raw footage (including the ceremony) because his deliverable was only a 2-3 minute video. After complaining, I think I should be getting the full footage soon.
We did share our professional photos of the ceremony with all our guests after. That way, if they wanted pictures of the ceremony, they could have access to them.
The reception we didn’t request any limits, and it was fun seeing everyone’s pictures since it was a fun party by then!
<EDIT> I added below one of my favorite pics, which is my walk down the aisle. I love that there are no phones and people creeping out into the aisle!
Post # 58
yep, I’m just going to have the celebrant ask people to please not take photos during the ceremony, and that there will be opportunities to have photos with the couple afterwards. I don’t want to walk through a sea of screens and I think that it looks bad in the professional photos. After the ceremony/at the reception I don’t mind.
Post # 59
In this day and age it’s unrealistic to have one. I know people do and their reasons are “be present” or they don’t want pictures with people in the background holding up cell phone cameras. In my opinion I think it’s rude to ask. Even before cell phones people were taking pictures on cameras.
This is the day and age of technology and to fight it is kind of old fashioned. Have fun with it, make a hashtag, Instagram page etc.
Post # 60
I will be having a small ceremony–with a dozen guests at the most– so I don’t mind if if just a few people take pics. However if it was a larger ceremony I’d definitely ask folks to turn off their phones.