(Closed) Unresponsive bridesmaids…..Seriously why is it so difficult to say hi? Vent.

posted 2 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 17
Member
813 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2018 - Farm

akshali2000 :  I understand what you are trying to do but I also understand where the bridemaids are coming from. Yes, you would like all your friends to meet and get along, as they will be in your wedding together. However, not everyone will be friends or get along. I think they should be adult enough to be cordial to one another for the sake of your wedding and their invidivual friendships with you. You can’t keep pusing for people to meet. Just because they meet doesn’t mean they will automatically like each other. I told my friend one time. Hey, its okay that you would like for me to hang out with you and some of your other friends but what you have to understand is we aren’t going to all like each other but we are mature enough to get along when in the same room. I’ve told her don’t expect us all to just be friends. It’s not going to happen because we all have different personalities among other things.  

I was a bridemaids in her wedding and I didn’t care for 3 of her bridesmaids. We all knew each other because we all work for the same company and have been in social settings together at our mutual friends house that got married. We weren’t friends, we didnt try to be friends but we were cordial. To this day she is only friends with me and one other friend from her wedding party and there were 6 of us including her now sil. You’ve done your due diligence and at this point you are just trying to force things.

Post # 18
Member
2188 posts
Buzzing bee

I didn’t view being a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my friends wedding as a way to make new friends. I mean, I love her and am very glad I went, but I wasn’t looking to be BFFs with her other BMs. Like pp said, we all got along the few days we were together, and that was it. Her Maid/Matron of Honor reached out to all of us while she was planning her shower and that’s to be expected.

I think you are going to stress yourself out way too much having these expectations. Just let it be, if someone wants to chat, they have the emails & facebook chat. You can’t force it and its not an expected thing in my opinion. Everyone can be friendly and have a great time without needing to chat or email basically strangers. The events of the wedding will bond whoever it bonds. You can’t force this.

Post # 19
Member
11787 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

I think many people would just prefer to get to know one another in a more organic way, in person. Fair or unfair, I also think it’s possible that people may be reading something more into your motives for pushing them to introduce themselves to one another at this time. BMs have no responsibilities or obligations to plan events or parties other than what they choose to do on their own. They only need show up appropriately attired and stand up for you at the wedding. 

The onus is actually on you to introduce them at the appropriate time, not on them to reach out to one another. 

The topic ‘Unresponsive bridesmaids…..Seriously why is it so difficult to say hi? Vent.’ is closed to new replies.

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