Post # 1
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
My friend’s cousin-in-law has his own DJ business. So he obviously knows and works with a lot of wedding vendors and hangs out at bridal conventions, etc.
I’ve met him a total of …. 5 times in my life so I basically barely know him. He seems like a decent enough guy, but total opposite personality/style/etc from me and my fiance.
He has offered to help us with anything we may need while planning our wedding. This would be fine, except, like I said, I don’t really know him enough to feel comfortable with this. Plus he mentioned his prices once in casual conversation and I feel like they’re a little steep (and I did NOT like his music/DJ style).
So I am friends with him on Facebook and he keeps sending me messages and stuff practically BEGGING to help us with planning. I won’t lie — I have run into some rough spots, especially on our small budget. But again, I don’t know if I feel comfortable enough with him to enlist his help. Plus I don’t think we’d be on the same page.
And this sounds really horrible, but how do I tell him I really do not want HIS DJ services? Or if I do break down and let him help us (because we could use all the help we could get), am I obligated to invite him and his wife to our wedding?? I don’t think our budget would allow for it and I BARELY KNOW HIM!
Ugh this is so stupid. What would you do?
Post # 3
Member
60 posts
Worker bee
I would say.. Hey I really appreciate your offer.. We will definately keep you in mind if anything is needed. You could also tell him that you are tgoing to check out a DJ one of your friends recommended who had used them for their wedding.
Post # 4
Member
2790 posts
Sugar bee
@Stace126:Just tell him that you most certainly appreciate his offer but at this time your just not ready/prepared to make a DJ decision just yet. Make it sound like you have all the time in the world and haven’t even really begun to think about it. Or if you feel bad doing that ask for his help in some other area of wedding planning. Tell him you need help finding a florist or a great caterer and ask him to give you some suggestions. Give him something else to concentrate on rather than his own services.
Post # 5
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
I’d go with what PPs said — just say that you haven’t really gotten to that point in planning quite yet and you’ll keep him in mind when the time comes.
Post # 6
Member
2053 posts
Buzzing bee
@Stace126: I’d be upfront with him that you do not want his services otherwise he will keep badgering you. Say that you appreciate his offer and his business but you are looking elsewhere. Period. You do not owe him an explanation, but if you feel it necessary to explain further, say that it is due to budget and musical taste. If you want to explain even further, you cannot compensate him the cost for his service he mentioned in conversation before, and say that your specific taste in music is not among his collection. If you explain too much though, that may leave the door open for him to negotiate, so be very clear with him if you’re willing to give him a shot or close the door completely.
If you are willing to give him a shot, you need to put it to him straight. Unless he is willing to: a) consult with you on your style of music and conform to it for your event and b) come down in price to meet your budget, you will continue to search elsewhere. If he is a good businessman, he will consult with you and match your needs. You would not be obligated to invite his wife to the wedding. At that point, he would be hired for his services as a vendor.
This is a business proposition he is offering you, so treat it like business and don’t get caught up in trying to be too nice. Sure, be polite, but don’t feel like you have to bend over backwards to meet the needs of a prospective vendor instead of your own needs for your wedding day.
