Post # 1
I have a friend who I was her Maid/Matron of Honor for her wedding. Shortly after the wedding we had a bit of a falling out because I felt the entire time that I was just in the way and that the things I did went unnoticed or unappreciated. I know weddings can be stressfull and that she may not have noticed, but some hurtful things were said. Now, my Boyfriend or Best Friend and I have talked alot about getitng married and he has told me he is going to propose on our vacation in early December.
This friend and I have decided that we are going to try and work on our relationship, but I fear there may be some resentment there, on both sides. Money tends to come up as an issuse. I was originally a Bridesmaid or Best Man in her wedding but when her original Maid/Matron of Honor was dropped from the bridal party, I was asked to set up and I did gladly. She and I are not as good of friends as we used to be in high school, and I felt the whole time that one of her other Bridesmaid or Best Man would have been better for Maid/Matron of Honor because she seemed to be closer to them. Anyway, long story short, I know I still have time, but I am unsure if I want her in the bridal party. Another friend fron high school is going to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, but this friend and I in the past have talked about being in each other’s weddings and I am afraid after this fight that it would just be awkward. Has anyone else run into this kind f situation where you are unsure? Thanks for your help!
Post # 3
I would work on the relationship with her and wait to pick your bridal party until about 6 months before the wedding. I think it reduces the drama by waiting to pick your bridal party.
Post # 4
I agree with EvaBoston Terrier. I would also say when you DO pick your bridal party, choose people that you are very close to and WANT standing up next to you. Do NOT choose them because you feel obligated.
Post # 5
I would also agree with the others and wait to pick your bridal party. It’s amazing how things can change within a year, or even just a few months. I was in a similar situation as you, when my best friend from high school and I had a little rift in our friendship shortly after I got engaged, and I had already asked her to be a bridesmaid. Luckily, things have worked out, and our friendship has gotten back to where it was, but it would have been so much easier if I would have just waited because I had been having on and off doubts about this friend being a Bridesmaid or Best Man.
Post # 6
I agree on waiting to ask anyone to be bridesmaids. I asked my girls right away because they have been my best friends since middle school so I know they’re not going anywhere but in your situation, I would wait until you know for a fact that these girls will still be in your life come time for your wedding. It adds so much unnecessary stress when you have to deal with MOH/bridesmaid drama.
Post # 7
i would also suggest waiting till 6 months prior to your wedding. one of my Bridesmaid or Best Man automatically assumed she was going to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man bc to her i’m one of her closest friends because she has few friends but to me i have many. so i just figured it’ll be fine having her as my Bridesmaid or Best Man. unfortunately, ever since I got engaged, she has been emailing me every other wk on Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses, demanded i change the color (although my fiance really loves the color we chose), and when we went shopping for wedding dresses, she couldnt even wait a couple minutes when i was changing between gowns and would run off and grab a pile of Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses. now, i hafta deal with telling her that i do not want her to be a part of the wedding party anymore. soo…just wait a bit, especially with the high stress of weddings, people’s true colors come out and if something happend between the 2 of you before it may happen again