Post # 1
I’m having a real issue deciding who to choose as my bridesmaids. My fiance knows three people he for sure wants to include in the wedding, but I’m feeling lost who to include on such a special day. My sister is my Maid/Matron of Honor, that was a given. I asked my good friend who Ive been close with for a long time, but she doesn’t seem excited at all. This breaks my heart, though at the same time I understand because she is going through a rough time with men and her dating scene. I am also at that age when I am settling down with someone, have a full time demanding job and just don’t feel like partying 4 or even 2 days a week anymore.My friends…aren’t with me on those so we’re losing touch quickly. I never thought I would be getti married without knowing who to incorporate in the wedding party. And I never thought the people who I do have wouldn’t be excited! Has anyone else experienced this? Advice?
Post # 3
Is there a reason why she wasn’t so excited? Maybe the money aspect? Maybe it was a bad day? I’m a little unsure of who to ask (we’re just starting to plan!) but my partner and I agree that we don’t have to have an equal wedding party. I know my good friend C and her husband didn’t have their own wedding party, but rather a shared party and it was pretty cool! Is it possible to do something like that? My partner and I have briefly talked about it, especially since two of my closest friends are dating each other (I’ve known the guy for about 7 years and his girlfriend and I have become really good friends super quickly – we’ve actually never even met since they live about 5 hours away!). If we dont’ have a shared wedding party, he’s just going to be my Bridesdude (he prefers that to Bridesman). How do you feel about having a Bridesman if you have any close male friends? You can also skip the wedding party all together. When my mom got remarried, I was her attendant. Honestly, I feel like I don’t have a ton of close female friends who are local. My old roommate and I got back in touch about a year ago and the past 3 or 4 months have become good friends again and I will definitely ask her.
Post # 4
Although I would say we aren’t going completely traditional with our wedding, one thing I would like to keep on the traditional side is having BMs and GMs. We have thought about incorporating my FIs two sisters, but honestly we arent very close because they live in different states!
I’m not entirely sure why my bff doesn’t seem as excited as I had hoped. It’s just disappointing. I want to have people who I will be close with for life…and the transitional period I’m going through with my friends (I’m not so much for partying all of the time & staying up all night searching for dudes like I was in college) makes it that much harder.
I was always planning on asking my close friend B until she recently got married, and although invited me to her Bach (there were only 5 of us) didn’t ask me to be in her wedding. Ugh I never would have fathomed I would be in this predicament!
Post # 5
@Cala: I feel the same way about having BMs and GMs, but we’re just having a very small party so we don’t have to worry about asking a lot of people. Each of us agreed to have the siblings involved (so my brother on his side, and Future Sister-In-Law on my side) and then we chose two friends. We really couldn’t think of a huge amount of people to have in our parties. It’s okay to be uneven!
Post # 6
I can absolutely relate to where you are coming from. It’s tough to stay close with girlfriends you made while you were single and partying when that’s not where you are in your life anymore, and they still are. You should definitely not feel like you are alone. I also think sometimes there are people in your life who seem close, until you think about whether they would have your back or make you feel your best on the biggest day of your life, and you realize that maybe they’re not that supportive person you need. You are lucky to have a sister you know you can count on–if you can’t think of anyone else to ask, just have her. Your family is your family no matter what. It’s okay for your fiance to have 3 attendants and you to only have one.