(Closed) Unwanted Guests!!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
380 posts
Helper bee

If people are expecting to get in then you could have a problem. Have you considered hiring security? It might seem extreme, but if it prevents an extra 150 people getting in, then it’ll be worth it! That way, you don’t have to deal with it either – security handles it. Just have everyone bring their invites, or have a guest list to give them.

Post # 4
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Can you have it far enough away that only those invited would be tempted to come? Maybe 1.5 – 2 hours away?

Post # 6
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

Can you have the reception as a site separate from the ceremony and make the ceremony open, but be very clear about a closed, private, invitation-only reception?

Post # 7
Member
7902 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

@LucybrideTO:  The best way is with a double envelope. The outside is addressed to the heads of household and then the inner envolpe lists each individual invited.  If you want to be even more clear, you can write the names on the response card in advance as well. I would also put on the bottom of your invite where it normally says something like “Reception to follow” sometime more like “Private reception to follow.”

Post # 8
Member
380 posts
Helper bee

@LucybrideTO:  You could do your invites like normal (guests name plus how many extra guests they can bring) and either have them RSVP with the names of each extra guest for you to add to the guest list, OR you could add their name to the guest list plus how many extra guests they can bring (a number) and security can just let the total number of people in. I’m sure there’s better ways, but that was what came to mind.

Post # 9
Member
380 posts
Helper bee

You know how I said I’m sure there’s better ways? Well, what @brenda.m.fields said is one of those better ways! I like this idea Laughing

Post # 10
Member
1106 posts
Bumble bee

You can simply have someone at the door checking for invitations.  Make sure you let your guests know that they need to bring it or draft up a list of names and they must give their name at the door.

Post # 11
Member
724 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think the security thing is a good idea. Make a list of all the people you invited and give that list to whoever is monitoring the door. If they aren’t on the list or weren’t invited then sorry they can’t come in. Even if it is a cultural thing, a wedding is a very private event and I think you have the right to turn people away. It’s not rude on your part, it’s rude on their part for thinking they can just show up! 

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