(Closed) unwanted soon to be sister in law

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
46613 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Seriously, you already know the answer.

She is your FI’s SIL. She will not only be at the wedding, you will be seeing her at family occasions the rest of your life.

The two of you need to behave like adults and act civilly to each other whether you like each other or not.

Post # 4
10 posts
  • Wedding: March 2013

Part of being an adult is knowing how to be in same room as someone you don’t like and still keep your head on.  You’re an adult, and like the PP said, you know the answer.  You don’t have to hug and kiss her and be her best friend… but she is going to be your family and you have to play nice.

Post # 5
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Just ignore her at the wedding. Once its over, you have every reason to not welcome her into your home, but if your husband likes her, well then that’s a whole different argument right there

Post # 6
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013


It sounds like you’re stuck inviting her. Really, is this a battle you want to have? There’s no way you’ll come out of it looking good. (I sympathize; I wouldn’t want to invite her either.)

Your Fiance knows how you feel about her and how she treats you; I think it’s his responsibility to speak to someone in his family, either your Future Brother-In-Law or someone else that understands the situation, and ask them to keep an eye on her and rein her in if she gets out of line. You shouldn’t have to worry about this.

On the bright side, you’ll probably be so caught up in the moment and doing bride things, that you won’t even notice her. (And if you hear afterward, “FSIL said this or that!” just write it off; you know what she’s like and there’s no reason for anyone to tell you something like that except stirring the pot. I just mention it because I’ve read posts where that’s happened to a bride and upset her.)

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