(Closed) *UPDATE* and the drama continues…

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 2
2803 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

So he has you followed to make sure you are not seeing anyone, but it’s okay for him to bring some girl home right in front of you?? Nice double standard.

You dodged a bullet here, bee.

Post # 3
588 posts
Busy bee


Let all of your ‘team’ know about your ex esssentially hiring someone to keep tabs on you. Lawyer, police, etc. 

That is absolutly not okay. 

Post # 4
4238 posts
Honey bee


Cyber hugs to you, Bee.

Post # 5
1024 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Just stay in the mindset that you’re doing the right thing!! He is a complete psycho and you are doing the best thing for yourself and your safety. Stay positive and know that this will pass, you’re well on your way to getting through this nightmare 🙂 Sounds like you have a great support system both inside and outside of work as well.

Post # 6
4943 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Later I found out he was the one in the silver car and following me. He wanted to make sure, for my ex, that I wasn’t seeing someone else or going on dates or whatever.

You two are broken up. If you want to date someone else, you are more than able to do so! And honestly, how shitty of him to even have that thought after he brought another woman back to a home the two of you shared.

Don’t respond. From now on, if he has a friend deliver a message, do not accept it. And also let the police/lawyer know about this stunt he pulled. He basically had someone stalk you. 

I was thinking about you the other day and wondering how things were going. I’m glad to hear that you are still in such a positive mindset and are doing well! ((hugs))


Post # 7
628 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

View original reply
concernedfuturewife:  I would definitely contact the lawyer that put the restraining order in play for you ASAP; I’m sure by some kind of extension this is a violation of his terms of “no contact”. Writing letters is still contact. And having someone essentially stalk you on his behalf? I wouldn’t be surprised if your lawyer could include this new weird silver car “friend” in the restraining order based on the fact that he’s been following you on behalf of your restrained ex! (I know nothing about the law in your area btw, I’d just be appauled if he could legally get away with this)

Keep your head up and keep moving forward bee; it sounds like you yourself are off to a great start!

Post # 8
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2016 - New Orleans, LA

View original reply
concernedfuturewife:  read you restraining order. I work in a criminal court and we have two different kinds, restraining order and a “no contact” order. The latter bans all contact in any shape or form, written, typed, phone, text, in person, everything is banned and is a violation. See if this is the kind you have.   Also, you need to realllly be careful.  I have an awful feeling that this guy is not going to stop.  I truly hope I am wrong.  I work in a place where I see the aftermath of bad people doing bad things so am a bit jaded but better safe than sorry.  Does he know where your parents live?

Post # 9
1270 posts
Bumble bee

Contact your lawyer and inform them that your ex is continuing to communicate with you through a third party. Ask whether this is in violation of the restraining order and do not respond to your ex, let the lawyer handle that. Hand the letter over to them as proof, keep a record of everything. You may be able to press harrassment/stalking charges if this crap keeps up. Take pictures of the silver car and the guy if he shows up again or starts following you. Tell your ex’s friend if he approaches or follows you again you have no problem pressing harrassment charges against both of them.

Post # 10
523 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013 - Callanwolde Fine Arts Center

You should probably contact your lawyer about his friend following you and the letter. Depending on how the restraining order is written, that could be a violation of it. If not, your lawyer definitely needs to know about it anyway.

Post # 11
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2015 - On a Cliff Overlooking the Bay, Florida

View original reply
concernedfuturewife:  Next time the silver car follows you call the police and tell them you have someone following you and they will pull him over.  esp if he broke the restraining order by passing along a note form your ex.

Post # 13
5152 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

View original reply
concernedfuturewife:  I would assume its breaking the restraining order. Regardless, your lawyer and the cops should know ASAP that he has this guy following you around and that he did contact you.

UGH – I’m so sorry this is happening to you!! Just be aware of your surroundings. Does he know where your parents live?

Post # 14
1806 posts
Buzzing bee

This guy is unbelievable. And out of his mind. I agree with PP–please tell your lawyer, police, etc…whoever is involved. This is still harrassment.

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. And yes, he doesn’t want you to move on. He’s out of his mind but don’t let him put you out of yours–keep on going. Eventually, this bs will stop.


Post # 15
2251 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

Omg! This guy is some kind of  a maniac!  Please report this incident to your lawyer and the police asap.  This is not normal,  and you don’t deserve to live in a constant stress like that. This douchebag conTinues to harass you through third parties,  and is breaking the law. 

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