- 5 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
Hi Bees! As discussed in my last post: http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/to-elope-or-not-to-elope-canceling-our-current-plans , my Fiance was struggling with pleasing his family with the big wedding, and in his frustrations said we should elope. I took his comment to heart (he seemed serious), dug a little deeper, and we finally decided on what WE want.
Basically, he felt obligated to invited everyone. Which took our intimate wedding of 50 to a big (for us) wedding of over 100. My Fiance has very bad anxiety, and I could tell the stress was getting to him. When I got him to open up after work, he said that the thought of saying our vows in front of 100 people, having the attention on us constantly, he just said he couldn’t do it. It’s not intimate enough for him, and just doesn’t feel like us. He wants to be married to me like, right now, but the whole big wedding just isnt for him.
Also, our families are just being crazy about the whole thing. It came to a head when his brother (who we share a house with, and his new girlfriend of three months basically lives there with us) asked why we hadn’t made her a bridesmaid. Apparently, even though theyve only been together for three months, it was assumed that I would ask her. And since I didn’t (we had a bridal party of 12 already!) she got offended and didn’t think we were “friends” anymore (very immature, don’t get me started on her). Since then she has been cold, passive agressive, and snarky.
These combined forces helped us decide that eloping would just be best for us. My job is not 100% stable right now due to sequestration, and we decided to move out ASAP (for our sanity), fly to an all-inclusive resort somewhere, get married, and come home for a family bbq or something. We told his family over the weekend, and they were confused at first but now understand where we’re coming from.
We already feel so relieved about this plan, and Fiance seems so much happier now that we’re not getting bombarded with questions all the time. I was on the DW/elopement train in the first place, but now that he’s on-board, everything just feels like it’s falling into place – finally!
Any other bees cancel the wedding, and say “eff this, we’re eloping”?