(Closed) Update: I decided to leave

posted 7 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
3601 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 1992

I’m glad you feel good about the decision you made.  We don’t mind if you still hang out!

Post # 4
Member
1124 posts
Bumble bee

I am so glad that you decided to leave. If he does meet another woman and marry her? So what. At least your wants and needs aren’t being restricted by him. What you said to him makes perfect sense and was totally logical and respectful – his answers weren’t. No point in planning a future because he could die tomorrow? Right. And saying that he is more “unsure of you” when you express your opinion is emotional blackmail.

Good job woman! Keep your head up – plenty of men out there who love a woman who can assert herself and her needs.

Post # 5
Member
3982 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I am happy for you. It sounds like you really made the best decision for YOU. You can now focus on your life and one day find the real Mr. Right.

Post # 6
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee

You sound like you’re confident in your decision. Good for you! Actually, you sound more than confident–you sound fantastic! Here’s to a fresh start. 🙂

Post # 8
Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee

If, in a few weeks, things get hard or lonely and you start to question your decision, remember you have this to fall back on. 

Post # 9
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

yeah! now comes the hard part. . .sticking to it! 🙂

i remember your posts. . .you bf sounds like not the most committment-worthy guy in the world so I’m happy for you.

and when it gets hard, and you feel sad, just remember that you WILL feel better, you will get through it, and who knows what your life will hold 3 years down the road.

Post # 10
Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee

@wife_bris: Yes, but–you identified what you were doing!! Now you can make different choices.

Post # 11
Member
1577 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I’m so glad that you decided to make this decision for yourself.  You deserve so much more than it sounds like you were getting in your relationship.  I know how hard it is to start over completely, not knowing what the future will bring, but you’ve shown so much strength, just from what I’ve read here, that I know you’ll be fine.  And one day, the right man, who can’t wait to win you over and commit wholeheartedly, will come along and this will all just be a distant memory… an image in the rearview.

Hang in there!

Post # 12
Member
1368 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

Glad to hear you’re taking control. Doesn’t it make you feel liberated?

The only thing that really bothers me is thinking of him meeting someone else, marrying her and giving her everything I always wanted from him.  He wants to be friends, and I wouldn’t mind, but I think I would bawl my eyes out if I find out another girl “won him over”.  Dumb, I know.  That thought is what will keep me up at night, not so much that I miss/love him.  Does that say anything?

This, you are not alone! When I broke up with my uncommital ex, this was what I was fearing the most! I was crazy about him, I wanted him, I wanted things were different than they were. I know love is not a competition but I couldn’t(can’t) help but think like that. You are so not alone!

Post # 13
Member
7384 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Stay strong girl!  Just move forward a wiser woman!

Post # 14
Member
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I missed your back story, but I wanted to tell you how proud of you I am.   At 30, I had to start over, but with a little 7 month old baby.    It was beyond hard, terrifying but also so empowering.   I went to a counselor, so I could be prepared for those hard days. 

Since I was so busy with my son, I didn’t date for about a year and it was sporatic.  Then, I met my current finance.  If I had known how nice a relationship could be, I would have left my ex years before.   

You’re still so young and I am glad you are giving yourself a second chance!  It make be hard some days, but it’s really worth it!

 

Post # 16
Member
1543 posts
Bumble bee

Good for you! Stick to your guns, stay true to yourself, and remember you can always come here for support if and when you feel the need to. Good luck!

The topic ‘Update: I decided to leave’ is closed to new replies.

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