- 5 years ago
Semi-regular bee – alternate account.
You all were so sweet to provide advice last year. It really provided some much needed encouragement and critical thoughts I needed to hear. I’m here to write a short update and a request for follow up advice from anyone who has any thoughts.
Here is my original post:http://boards.weddingbee.com/topic/i-feel-so-guilty-for-not-wanting-to-support-my-boyfriend/
As an update, I did get the apartment and SO and I lived together. Financially, I ended up being just fine considering the circumstances. Things played out as I feared – SO did not find a job in his hometown where I worked and he left a few months ago for a job opportunity in SF. I’m not willing to follow him again (to an even higher cost of living city) without a proposal and he wanted to settle down in SF alone for now. I wish him the best.
I’m now in California with no family and a few acquaintances. My first instinct is to move back east closer to family and find a husband who has already established himself closer driving distance to my family, probably Pittsburgh or DC. I’m hesitant to leave this job, it is a federal govt position and I’m on track for a significant raise in August. And I do enjoy my job and coworkers.
I’ve joined okcupid, but I’m finding myself holding back to the idea of committing to anyone as I don’t want to stay in this area long term anymore. I’m 28 and I also don’t want to date to date, I want to date to get married and have the family/kids life. But at some point, I’m going to have to bring up my sincere interest in relocating in a few years within any relationship I start here in California. Nothing is set in stone of course.
How would you Bee’s prioritize finding a mate while having a solid career started in an area that you don’t want to stay? Did anyone move back closer to family to “reset” relationship options?