(Closed) Update on the relationship. Infidelity and lies.

posted 3 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
6369 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2009 - New York, NY

Leave him.  You deserve better.

Post # 17
Hostess
3158 posts
Sugar bee

He’s full of shit. There’s nothing to save here. Sorry, Bee.

Post # 18
Member
1364 posts
Bumble bee

I’d be packing up my things and leaving, immediately if not sooner. You are worth much more than this. There is NO excusing ANY of this. I’d also be getting tested for Save-The-Date Cards. I’d put money on his physically cheating as well. I’m sorry you’re going through this, but respect yourself enough to get out now.

Post # 19
Member
840 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Come on dude dump him for fucks sake. He isn’t marriage material. 

Post # 20
Member
55 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: February 2018

Do not feel stupid. Please just leave him and hopefully you’ll feel like you made the best decision of your life. There are SO many MEN out there, you do not need a lying, (most likely) cheating BOY in your life. His excuse was pathetic. Seeing this stuff makes me feel so sad. You deserve better. 

Post # 21
Member
2176 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

He’s full of shit and lies.  Let his ass go…

Post # 22
Member
6560 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

If you have to talk yourself into staying, perhaps staying isn’t the best decision…

Post # 23
Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

So even if you want to believe that he wasn’t hooking up with these girls (or at least trying to hook up), are  you okay with him, at a minimum, interacting with live women to get his rocks off (he couldn’t call or text you?). Or he is leading poor women on by sexting them. 

He is just a creep and you deserve better. 

Post # 25
Member
303 posts
Helper bee

A relationship has two people in it, only two. Dump him and tell him to have fun getting off to dating sites for the rest of his days because NO self-respecting woman would be with that scumbag!

Post # 26
Member
5002 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

Do you really want to be THAT girl?

Post # 27
Member
364 posts
Helper bee

makomaiden :  you are not stupid. But dont go into shock or denial either. “his excuse was he wasn’t going to do anything and was using their responses and conversation as porn. I get that.” Do you really “get that” though? That’s nonsense. When all a guy wants is porn, he gets porn, not hookup sites and ads.

My ex tried to say he was only on those same sites/apps for “talking, cyber sex”- that’s a lie. Guys only go on those hookup apps and sites to hookup. He got caught w his hand in the cookie jar – are you gonna believe your own eyes or believe his lies? And, if he thinks you believe that nonsense of an excuse, I bet you he will probably continue to try to hook up through those sites and apps bc he thinks that he’s smart enough (or you’re stupid enough) to not get caught. Even when you already caught him redhanded.

Please check out ChumpLady.com – that site has a lot to help sift through bs excuses and lies about cheating. 

Post # 28
Member
76 posts
Worker bee

Leave. Now

Post # 29
Member
1178 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

makomaiden :  Oh my goodness, bee!! First, I have been in that exact scenario with my ex. It was during our first year of marriage and I was young (21) and desperately wanted to believe him, like you do with your SO. I stayed with him for another 7 years, had a child with him, and went through countless issues with his eyeing other women, etc. At the end of the day, we split up. Why? A multitude of reasons. However, number one on the list was that he wanted to live like a single guy and visit strip clubs, party with college aged females (he was 32 at this time, which is just sleezy for a married man to do) and do whatever he wanted regardless of how it impacted his family.

I finally told him I was done and I am happier than ever now with a man who values manogomy and is trustworthy.

I know you’re invested in this guy, but you need to leave before things get even messier. He won’t stop.

I’m sorry, I know you don’t want to hear this, but he is a dirt bag and the sooner you get out, the sooner you can find the love of your life! I wish I had taken notice sooner that my ex was so slimey.

Post # 30
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

He’s horrible, bee. Dump him.

So sorry, truly.

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